“Alone, even doing nothing, you do not waste your time. You do, almost always, in company. No encounter with yourself can be altogether sterile. Something necessarily emerges, even if only the hope of some day meeting yourself again.” – Emil Cioran
It’s my honest belief that people aren’t built to be alone. Most people can’t stand silence. The world grows noisier and faster every day. We rarely stop and look around, we rarely try to spend time alone, to figure things out for ourselves.
“Why?” is the one question that makes us more human than any other, and we’ve stopped asking it. We don’t care.
But artists are different. When I was a kid, every month or so, I caught a cold. I was weak, skinny, anemic, and was blessed with a bunch of chronic illnesses. I didn’t spend much time outside, playing with other kids my age. For a long time, my whole universe contained just my house. Looking back at all those years, it seems sad. The cold perspective, the stranger observing someone else’s life. But it wasn’t.
As a kid, life is often simple. I played with my toys, making up stories. I read books, tried to learn so many different things that I could talk to an adult as equals. It was fun, actually. But I also spent a lot of time alone, in silence. But my mind was never quiet.
Solitude grants you this bizarre freedom, filling your mind with questions and answers and noise and stories. I spent a lot of time building the life I was going to have. I spent more time some place else than my body. This filled my soul with bitter hope and fear. Not fear that my dreams would never come true, but fear that they would come true and turn out to be different than I had expected.
I wanted to be unique, I wanted to be great.
And the more I drowned in solitude, the more I needed it, the more I desired it.
Solitude changes a man. Or a kid. It makes him weary to go out into the world, to experience life. The world outside his window can never be as beautiful as the one inside his head.
I believe that this desire for solitude is the highest price an artist has to pay. Because you, as a writer, singer, painter, never stop being alone. Not even in the most crowded of places. A part of your mind is always some place else, contemplating the possibility of a different life. The artist’s mind lives as much in the present as it does in the future and the past.
To paraphrase Andy Warhol, sometimes I feel as if I’m watching TV. My life is not my own. I don’t know who the people in my life are, and they don’t know me. I’m just an observer. Also, I lost the damn remote control.
Around the age of 16 I gave up on writing. I just couldn’t handle the silence anymore. I wanted to live. And I did. It worked for a while, but I always got this sense the the louder the world around me got, the more people I met, the less everything around me felt real.
I had paid the price and there was no going back.
Think of it as soul selling. You know, Robert Johnson, Niccolo Paganini, sort of things. A stranger in the night offering to give you what you want most.
If you want to be an artist, if you want it more than anything else in the world, then you have to spend a lot of time alone. Writing is one of the loneliest of jobs. But so is singing, so is painting. Yeah, you get your crowd of crazed fans, but can they relate to you, can they understand you?
So you want to be a writer. And you start writing. If you do this often, if you spend a lot of time writing, you’ll also spend a lot of time all by yourself.
I know that a lot of you are not going to agree with the following statement. I have always felt that all great writing has close to nothing to do with the empathy we feel towards others. We write and with every story we finish we lose a bit of our soul. And because of that we want to write something beautiful, just so it’s worth paying the price. Because fame, glory, money don’t really matter when you stop feeling alive, when your mind is always some place else.
All great stories are about what will never be. Odes dedicated to the great tragedy of losing who you are among so many different futures, dreams, aspirations. Our characters are not only who we are, but also who we wished to be. Once, if the world had been different.
John Steinbeck once said, “All great and precious things are lonely.”
And only in that solitude can we properly appreciate a piece of art. Reading a book, listening to a song, staring at a painting, all demand that you shut out the rest of the world. A great book almost always demands that of you.
Maybe this is what makes art so important. The link it creates between human beings. Miles and years apart. You get to see inside my head, and I get you to spend a few moments alone, wishing to find out who you are and what’s your place in this world.
We don’t want to be alone, we never do, but some of us have to.
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Beautiful xxxx
Beautifully said.
Your childhood sounds like that of Robert Louis Stevenson :)
Loved it. Would like to share it with the world if you allows only then.
Truth well spoken. Any artist can appreciate this.
I believe that this desire for solitude is the highest price an artist has to pay. Because you, as a writer, singer, painter, never stop being alone. Not even in the most crowded of places. A part of your mind is always some place else, contemplating the possibility of a different life. The artist’s mind lives as much in the present as it does in the future and the past.
This paragraph actually brought tears to my eyes. This was a very beautiful post
This is wonderful. Your words never cease to amaze me. They are so true and raw. Thank you for writing because I love seeing inside your head.
"We write and with every story we finish we lose a bit of our soul." This is so true and I completely agree. We always put a piece of ourselves in the content, context, and grammar of our writing. That's the best way to truly know who we are and who others are as well. Great post!
very thoughtful – I do like my alone time — it is precious and when I can appreciate things — to much noise and I am overwhelmed–I need to find my quiet place
THIS GAVE ME CHILLS !!!!! I felt a piece of me in every. single. sentence you wrote. I am bookmarking this. Thankyou !!!!!!
Reblogged this on Excursions Into Imagination and commented:
A great expression of artistic process and how it comes about. The muse reqires solitude and an objective view of life.
Well put as usual. I agree that many artists are, as Warhol said, observers. Even when we experience life we watch ourselves. It's that ability to observe and comment that requires a good deal of silence. I have been this way for as long as I can remember. Wanting some quiet time to daydream and make up what ifs for myself and others. It came from having a lot of alone time as a child. My lack of playmates and loneliness allowed me the gift to create. And I now love the idea of sharing these thoughts and worlds with others so they too can not only feel but observe.
Magritte a Belgian Painter said the most beautiful voyage I can make, is the voyage through my room! Meaning the same stuff you wrote !
I agree with you for the most part. When I write it's extremely lonely, just me, myself, and I with the computer in front of me. However, when I blog–and I consider that a form of writing–I am not alone. I am sharing with the entire world. And that's a heady feeling.
“If you’re going to try, go all the way. Otherwise, don’t even start. This could mean losing girlfriends, wives, relatives and maybe even your mind. It could mean not eating for three or four days. It could mean freezing on a park bench. It could mean jail. It could mean derision. It could mean mockery–isolation. Isolation is the gift. All the others are a test of your endurance, of how much you really want to do it. And, you’ll do it, despite rejection and the worst odds. And it will be better than anything else you can imagine. If you’re going to try, go all the way. There is no other feeling like that. You will be alone with the gods, and the nights will flame with fire. You will ride life straight to perfect laughter. It’s the only good fight there is.”
— Charles Bukowski (Factotum)
I love this!
Mais, oui!
Factotum has been on my reading list for too long. I think this quote just put it on top of the list. Thanks for sharing.
I enjoy being alone, or at least away from people. I prefer my characters and stories to most people. Sad, but true. And noise kills me. Thundering bass, screaming, even people talking incessantly under my windows… I am never without silicone ear plugs, no matter where I am. I treasure silence above all things. There's simply not enough of it anymore because you're right. Most people seem to crave noise. Offices are rarely quiet anymore. Stores and restaurants play music. I always want to say "SHUT THE EFF UP!" Because I can't concentrate, I can't write if there is too much noise. It intrudes on my private world.
Why would you write faster ??? Do you really think it would make a difference? You could also make just one sentence, but a very good one, maybe the best, or….Why would you write faster ?….
I love being alone. I don't get many chances but when I do I'm usually at peace and reflective in a good way. It's when I'm constantly surrounded by people that I can get uptight and moody. But being lonely can be very distressing too. Lovely,thoughtful post.
Great post – depressing in its own way. I often find my greatest ideas stem from thoughts whilst in solitude. I crave solitude when writing.
Wonderful and resonates. As one who loves and HATES his solitude and is so used to it, this truly hits home. Wonderful post Christian I appreciate reading it.
You just reminded me who I am. Who I was before kids. That's a special gift, so thank you. I don't need it all the time, but a glimpse now and then is refreshing.
I wonder if that is a common experience among artists, that time spent alone during childhood. And then is it being an artist that causes one to be solitary, or being alone that causes one to become an artist. Interesting thoughts.
That's quite the paradox, isn't it? I can guess that it works both ways. You can want to become an artist and then, just because you have to work hard at it you need to drown yourself in solitude.
“Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
I love how much this posting engaged my thought processes! If the artist loses a piece of his soul in creating his art (or the writer in finishing his story), then do you suggest that the artist is a mere vessel whose potential is finite?
I'd say no. The soul is infinite. When you think there's nothing more to write about, a story pops up out of nowhere.
My favorite analogy would be that the soul is like a rechargeable battery. You go out into the world, live, experience, and observe, and you recharge your soul with love, hate, passion. Then you pour it all into the stories you write. It hurts every time, and it doesn't matter that you'll never lose your soul entirely.
Funny how after reading this I feel a little less alone. Thank you for this beautiful post.
As you've been told many times here, it is truly beautiful. No other words to describe the eloquence of this post. You are an honest artist.
You make some excellent points.
Distractions nowadays blind us from silence.
:)
Solitude provides open range for the mind to grow, but the interaction of others is the rain that can mold, shift, and even sustain the landscape. The rain will always come and go, but the valleys and banks carved by the waters will be an indelible addition to the lone soul. In the immortal words of Colonel Sanders "I'm too drunk to taste this chicken."
Beautiful! But I beg to differ on one count: I think writing really is connected with empathy for others, even if those others are the characters we write about. I happen to be writing a story about a character who discovers the one thing he thought he never had: empathy for others. There's double empathy going on here–my own for the fictional guy I've dreamed up, and that fictional guy's self-awareness and empathy. Haha, at this point I don't know which I need more — a shrink or a drink!
This was a beautiful piece.
Cristian, consider this: Wouldn't you be more alone if you didn't write? Isn't it true that is writing you share some of the most intimate parts of yourself which otherwise would remain uncovered. In sharing your posts alone, you have an audience. On this page are others who connect and consequently, they are less alone. Perhaps in writing, we are less alone.
Denise
It's true. In writing we are less alone. I think that, even in a strange way, we all want to be normal, average. We don't want to stand out. Safety in numbers, I guess. So when we meet others just like us, we feel less alone. Even if we're an ocean apart. It's not the most ambitious of earnings, but it makes life a bit more bearable.
exactly. very well written. I've found that some of my best ideas came from times when I was alone. either reading avidly or walking around galleries or zoos. Just enjoying my own thoughts as they float in ………
This ties in very well with the post I just published called "I'm in one of those moods". Thank you for this posting – I'm going to read it end to end in a bit when I'm alone in my room…
everything in me resonates with Cioran's opening…and i'm ruled by Jesse Ball's "we are not human…not when we're alone"
So truly quoted: "But my mind was never quiet"…and ,"So you want to be a writer. And you start writing"….
Great post. Love that Steinbeck quote!
Wow! Thank you for letting me know that I was not a weird kid. I too spent alot of time alone due to a lot of childhood illnessess.I missed alot of school due to being ill. I use to sit in the window watching other kids happily playing games when I was stuck inside. Like you I turned my solitude into fantasy time. I read alot and even journeled my hidden desires of not being able to participate in the activities like my friends.
This posts brings back memories.
This really resonated with me. I honestly prefer being alone. These days, I actually like my own company. Beautiful post.
I completely agree that an artist is a person in solitude, a watcher from the window of a bus – it doesn't matter where he or she goes, but the journey does, the soul marked with numerous imprints. This is why we feel that urge to tell our stories, actually the story of what and who touches us. Thank you :)
You touched on a subject that has to be part of me in order to do what I do.
I accept being alone in order to make beautiful things. Least I think so :)
I also know when its time to fly. Reach out and do other things.
Thank you for making me so aware. Beautiful post!
A human is not suppose to be afraid of giving the soul, it is not just loosing the soul.And to read others means not to be alone, but be in the good company.
I can totally relate to the solitude of your childhood – mine was also largely solitary but for a host of reasons other than illness.
I TOTALLY relate to your feeling of observership, I have also long felt that 'I was only sent here as an observer' and when I read that you feel the same – I am almost shouting YES – out loud.
Years ago a friend wrote an article entitled something like 'what do you collect' – it was about the love of artwork, but my inner response to her question was that I collect silences. The silence of the desert night after the crickets have quieted down and the wind is still, the silence before dawn, the silence between my heartbeats that can be heard in such circumstances.
Beautifully said. Thank you!
Reblogged this on zeejewelry and commented:
Excellent post by Christan Mihai
I'd agree with the first part. I've done longish walks and other activities that involved being "alone", or at least by myself for sometime. Every time it was people I started to miss the most. No a specific person, but some intangible notion of a person.
I've always been pretty much alone, and that love/hate attitude is something I can really understand. Thanks.
17,000 followers!!!! I agree with you. As a painter I live in a world where most of the time I go along and talk about their world. I just wrote about that. We artists look at the world differently. we do need our solitude.
I love my solitude …. then again , I am on the autism spectrum…. Love your writing – am probably your biggest fan …. I am sharing it on my own blog today if I may …..
http://www.myaspiefiles.com
I really enjoyed reading this. I agree with you. Being alone is precious and lovely.
"If you want to be an artist, if you want it more than anything else in the world, then you have to spend a lot of time alone. Writing is one of the loneliest of jobs. But so is singing, so is painting. Yeah, you get your crowd of crazed fans, but can they relate to you, can they understand you?"
Well stated.
Thanks!
~ KP
This is an incredible post, and it will help non artists understand the artistic psyche! with your permission, may i reblog? thanks, lisa/z
Of course you can reblog or mention this post or any other in any way you want. This is a democracy after all.
thanks! i am from the old school of etiquette, where one asks with respect! muchas grrracias!
z
In Catholicism, we believe solitude is important if we are to hear God. The noise and busyness of everyday life can drown out the quiet voice of God, and so those who want to hear him need times when they withdraw into solitude. Some people devote their lives to solitude and prayer, but even for those of us who have lives in the world, we still benefit from times of solitude where we can get our bearings.
Absolutely beautifully said. I feel you, brother.
This post made me feel like a writer!
I Spent much lonely time as a child.I have seldom felt lonely when I am alone, but I often felt so in crowds. That has changed; but it has taken a long time.
I agree with what you wrote.
Thank you for your insight.
Christian, I know this all too well: "I spent more time some place else than my body." I'm almost sixty and feel as though I've only fully come into my flesh in the past ten years or so.
Sometime in my twenties, for I couldn't have done it before, I began craving solitude. I moved from the city (suburbs) where I was born and raised and flew across the country to the furthest possible point. I settled in the woods, alone – save for wildlife and a beautiful clear lake with an open view of the mountains surrounding me. Many times I thought I would go crazy from all the stuff rambling around in my head. Perhaps I WAS crazy, at least for a good ten years or more. Having and raising kids provided a bit of a distraction. But when they went to school, again there was silence, all around.
Since that time, I have always lived out in the country, in the silence, close to nature and far from many people. My husband and I are together, and how it works is that we are both solitary creatures. We enjoy one another's company, but give each other big spaces of alone-ness.
As for giving up bits of my soul when I write, on this point we differ. Writing has been the single act that has kept me sane and allows me to continue exploring large spaces of silence, knowing I will come out of it with wordless, formless concepts that percolate down into ideas to write about (some private, some public). Writing and silence are, for me, like a figure eight – a flowing, neverending continuum of space and no-space.
Thanks for the thoughful post! Really enjoyed reading it.
Great post. I couldn't agree more.
Being alone has always been my lifestyle starting with being an only child who lived in the country. Even today I prefer being alone and I really don't want to be considered normal or like everyone else. My writing is a fantastic way of expressing my feelings freely and in the process just being me.Oh, for a cave!
thank you….this was like music to my eyes!
I thought I was the only one who viewed my life like this. Thank you for reminding me I'm not
Hi Christian.
Great, great post on Solitude. We need it. Without it we cannot reflect, dream, create and simply relax.
Rolain.
[...] Cristian Mihai’s post, Solitude [...]
In fact, I tend to keep myself alone where my thoughts are reflected. Though sometimes, I would like to find my close friends. I can identify with tonettejoyce's feeling that I feel lonely with the crowds.
I could relate to most of what you've written. 'Solitude makes a man weary to go out into the world'. Only difference: I'm not a writer..yet!!
I usually dont reblog. But I'd love to reblog this..if you're ok with it.
Of course, no problem.
You are right. Creating art is a lonely process. But I think even artists should take breaks from loneliness and spend time living in this world -not just observing. It gives their work new perspective.
(CRISTIAN, I HOPE AT LEAST YOU READ THESE COMMENTS BECAUSE THEY ALL SEEM TO BE WRITTEN FROM THE HEART).
I read each and every comment I receive. That's why they have to be moderated – so I can keep up with them. Unfortunately, I do receive a lot, so I can't reply quite as often as I would like.
Reblogged this on perceptionsofareluctanthomemaker and commented:
A beautiful post from a brilliant writer(published)!. I could relate so much of what he says, and couldnt have said it better!!
Solitude can indeed refresh one's mind and soul, so it's not as negative as the word itself implies. I think it's about a balance in life and taking time for oneself when needed.
"We write and with every story we finish we lose a bit of our soul." Sounds like something Camus would have said. Not sure I agree but then my forte is poetry, not fiction.
You are too young to write like this. Desist until you are somewhat decrepit, please. Decrepitude makes insight more tolerable. ;)
great post :)
I think most people are scared of being alone, at least most people around me. When alone you reflect and think, dream and relax, and most of us do not find time to do this, And it is easier, when not reflecting you cant come up with the idea that you are actually wrong. The noise becomes like a shelter from the judgement from your own heart and soul.
Thank you for making me think about this.
Thank you, very true yet there's a lot more to ponder now ;-)
I remember being such a lonely, tortured child who had much solitude. I was often punished for months at a time and sent alone to my room – not allowed to play outside, not allowed to talk on the phone or watch tv… and it was during those times of incredible loneliness and boredom that I began to dream and to read, imagining that I was the character traveling to far off places and creating those places – actually seeing them in my mind. I would rewrite stories in my mind and as horribly lonely as those times were, as terrible as the punishments were, I can now look back and see the hand of God protecting me, creating a passion for Him, for justice, for writing… and I am thankful. Thank you for sharing this post – it helped me gain some perspective.
And you know what? I love people, but I also love spending time with just me and the Lord and my thoughts. In times of solitude, I find that I'm in good company. Blessings! :)
I equate with every single word Cristian. You have literally written my thoughts. THANKYOU.
Time alone is essential to everyone even if some are afraid of being alone and only the brave face their own self and are happy to live with it. But there is an important part of ourselves that can only be found by interacting with others.
Please keep on writing because you obviously have talent for it but don't get isolated.
After reading this I want to shut myself up in a wooden hut with no Facebook and see what I can come up with. I'm so happy I found your blog.
brilliant. well-observed. Dunno what else to day really.
I find no appropriate words to say how much I liked this post. Amazing and true. You write so well.
Beautiful – love the steinbeck quote!
This was beautiful…but sad. At the age of 21 I gave up writing. I started back writing humor at the age of 58. I then transitioned into comics and a little art. It has been the most rewarding 4 years of my life. I don't do it for money. I do it for me and while I'm sometimes by myself…I am never alone. I can go back to what I have done, read the few comments I have received and I find myself in the company of friends who understand what I do.
BTW…Never give up on your dreams.
Reblogged this on The Twist.
It's like reading my own thoughts only better. I share your thoughts, hopes, fears and dreams. Everyday, I try my best to find those moments as a child when I was happiest and at peace the most. I think we can always recreate them in our way even if we are already adults. Thanks.
Well said! There was a very brief time when I wanted a social life. I broke out of my proverbial shell, went out and found real friends who didn't just live in my computer. That cured me. Today, I sit at home and create lots of weird abstract art. When I'm not drawing, I'm outside with my camera. I write in my spare time, while creating things when I'm supposed to be sleeping. I manage to get in lots of time with my family. A lot of that time is spent creating with my teenage son. Did I mention that I make 'upcycled' crafts?
A thoughtful piece, but I disagree with your last statement. More often than not, I'd rather be alone. I don't mind people in small doses, but that's enough. Strange, but true.
Thanks Cristian for your very insightful and healthy perspective. I too grew up alone much of my childhood. What I find interesting is that the voice in my head I heard at 10 has not changed a whole lot.
Of late I have been spending a lot of time sorting out the differences between solitude and loneliness as a counselor. Your insights into the necessity of solitude in the creative process really hit the mark. I would have to add that for me, what makes that "solitude" most productive and exciting is the interplay of my Creator's Voice with my own, urging me on throughout the process. The problem of loneliness comes when my focus is so totally inward that I lose touch with that other Voice. The blessing is in knowing that even there that Voice can penetrate even the darkest of darkness. (Psalm 139:7-12)
Reblogged this on Demented Musings.
Reblogged this on Arcane~Acumen.
Reblogged this on Written Here.
Reblogged this on Taradise and commented:
Hmmm…
Which leads us to "What is normal". Who is to say you or I are not normal? If you think and live at a level deeper than surface or visible, is that not your normal? Aren't there others with the same normal—as you pointed out, perhaps oceans apart but we connect on like planes? I enjoy your studies—keep sharing. Luv in Christ, Denise
'Not fear that my dreams would never come true, but fear that they would come true and turn out to be different than I had expected.'
You can choose to be an artist, but sometimes that's just who you are. And it scares the crap out of you because you know that you can be great, you can have this amazing life, but your head keeps it locked inside your mind. I run from it – I couldn't imagine being non-creative but I keep myself distracted because I would go insane if I had eons of time to spend with myself. It's a bitter-sweet blessing that masquerades as a curse, I suppose.
The post is beautiful, thank you.
My mother didn't want me to become a writer because she didn't think I could stand being alone. However, as I tried to tell her, I am alone no matter what because I am a writer. It can't be avoided, although I certainly enjoy my time with others. I just really enjoy being alone with my thoughts…and alone with the thoughts of other writers. I'm sure you know what I mean, dear friend of the mind.
Some people do love to be in solitude but at the same time you must go out and live in the world and experience. Do you give up a piece of your soul or create a piece when you write?
Love the quote by Emil Cioran.
Well stated. And I couldn't agree more, although I don't think I had put my finger on it so well until I read this. I've told many people that I could live happily the rest of my life in Jerome or Bisbee (two small mining towns in my home state). Living in a big city like Phoenix, people here have told me they could never live in towns that small. Being a musician and a writer, my favorite activities are solitary ones. The size of the town doesn't matter to me. Yet, these towns tend to attract artists. And now I know that it's because of the collective consciousness of the artists, almost like small space rocks being pulled together to create a planet. Although there may not be much verbal communication on a daily basis, there is an understanding and a feeling that we all share, Hmm. I believe you've just inspired me to blog.
I am part of a Bible study group. It has been brought up repeatedly that we should spend time alone, being quiet and listening. Many years ago (15 give or take a year or two) a friend told me that the reason I always had music playing was because I was afraid to be alone. That was VERY weird to me. I am more of a loner than people know. I prefer being alone most of the time. A few weeks ago my daughter took the living room stereo to her bedroom. So I haven't had any music playing in the background. I have realized that I don't miss it all. So my friend has been proved wrong after all these years. I enjoyed your writing today. thank you
If you can't be at ease with yourself for a hour in an empty room why would you presume to be at ease with a room full of friends? Society is gradually looking with suspicion at anyone who doesn't want to be part of the crowd, as if individuals threaten our culture in some way. I'd rather be the lemming who stands aside to see what's happening…..
Strangely, the path to self-worth and selflessness emerges from that place of discovery: silence and solitude. Your words are graciously stated and touch my heartstrings. Those of us who are introverts find it much easier to plunge into quietude–seek it, covet it. I wish for everyone the joy that you've found in that place of introspection. Your need for solitude produces an outpouring that you share, revealing for others your findings. One result is that the creative within can find the light of day and become.
As I readied your post I pictured in my mind a solitary and magnificent pearl hidden deep in the sea waiting to be discovered!
Alone but never lonely. Search for any excuse to be left in peace, why? because I must tell my self why I did or who did what in peace, without any interruptions, I want to hear my voice, my feelings , my thoughts..so many people..and they make me forget, what was mine to tell..so I wait..for others to sleep or watch tv..then I steal myself from company and sit with a keyboard..must tell myself..what..how..where. when and why..
I let these flames consume me for quite a while… I felt this freedom, this militant sense of purpose – but I chose to wait. But it's all still there… under the surface. I understand these words – thanks for posting
Beautiful. I like solitude, to be quite honest. An I feel it is essential for ALL human beings, not just artist. But there is an intricate connection between solitude and artists. I believe that the arts is very much interconnected to spirituality. and spirituality grows with quiet, alone time. Its the time when we are able to build a bond with God, the Universe, the Divine, etc… Creating our art gives us an opportunity disclose our soul, whether we admit it or not, whether we are aware of it or not. And its during that time that we begin to want to know ourselves deeper, and by knowing ourselves deeper we are then connecting to God because God resides in us and vice versa. But that's my personal take on it.
Thank you for sharing this beautiful, thought-provoking post.
I understand this post so well – today I will be thinking and writing about my own Solitude.
Wow. I've never viewed being an artist in this perspective, but it's too true to like it (for me). Often, I'm working away in my lonely office while my husband is in the other room and my son is sleeping… I'm dreaming of the outcome, I'm tuning everything else out, and I'm barely acknowledging my own physical self…
Scary.
Spot on post Cristian – good read and no disagreement from me. I like being with people, but I love my time alone spending it thinking and painting. For me it works, it sparks creativity.
CONGRATULATIONS> I am going back to read the post but I had to say that first. What a lot of comments, know they are gift to your writer's heart.:)
What a beautiful post, Christian. Thank you for this. Your words really resonate with me, as I continue to adjust to the "solitude" having just lost my husband. And, because I'm dabbling with writing…. wow, your words are so true.
Writing is a type of solitude where we open our hearts and souls to others. This makes it a dangerous art, for words are marks left for others to judge us by. This is worthy of the feeling of losing a piece of our soul. However, I tether my pieces and pull them back in, thus bringing with them pieces of others to add layers to my soul. This enriches us all.
And hopefully, these words carry with them a bit of weight (love) and a bit of focus to create something bigger and better than me.
Like children, we nurture them, feed them, shelter them and one day set them free out into the world. Once out there in the world, we often have no control over how they behave or are received. We can only pray we did a good enough job for them to make some small impact.
I for one could not be or create without the synergy from all that is around me. This includes the trees. The trees whose leaves whisper in the breeze and tell such tales you wish you could behold what they know. And yet if you listen carefully you will catch a bit and be able to feel it in your soul.
Juju
I just recently told some people in my class, when I think of my childhood, I just remember being alone a lot. They all gave me a sympathetic, "awww!", but I tried to explain to them, that that's not bad. I enjoyed that. And that time I spent alone really cultivated who I am today. I wouldn't be as sensitive, contemplative, or creative as I am if I hadn't been alone.
And i totally understand solitude being like a drug. On numerous occassions in my life, I like to go off and do my own thing, put myself through trying times where I'm just by myself and I have to figure out things alone. Every time I do that I grow, so I'm always looking for more opportunities to alone.
I have a different perspective. While I agree that most of the artists' time is essentially lost in working on the piece of the art, I also believe that the inspiration is often from their own perspective about the world around them. Therefore, most artists are out, living a social life observing various aspects of society and when they find something inspiring, they resort to solitude so as to engage their minds in analyzing & interpreting information about their inspiration and finally express their interpretation about it in an artistic way. Your argument that one loses a bit of soul every time they finish their piece of art is very debatable. Artists love what they do so much that they are willing to sacrifice a large part of their life struggling to get a good break. I am yet to come across an artist who get into the field of art for the heck of it and they actually wanted to do something else. Therefore, their soul is almost always recharged by what they do unlike other mortals who lose a bit of their soul every day when they go to the office, when they thought they should be jamming with their bands, or writing a poem. But I respect your perspective, and I did enjoy your post. I am no artist and I am no writer, so I shall not dare to disagree with you. But I hope you do respect other perspectives as well, and perhaps be more inspired to do what you do! Good luck!
its inspired me
Similiar to my own childhood. Wonderful post. :D
Wonderful and inspiring post. I spent much time alone as a child, wandering on the farm where I grew up with only animals around me, or sitting on my own reading a book. As an adult, I now find I can't be around people or noise all of the time – I desire quiet and time for contemplation heartily and feel unbalanced if I don't get enough of it.
Wow, heart breakingly true and so expressive of some of my own experiences. I would only add that though it's true I NEED (just like I need food and water) to be alone I also love it, I truly do. What hurts is when others take my need for solitude personally and assume I don't care about them/love them enough and I still haven't found a way to be with that. I feel like I'm not a good friend sometimes, nor a good member of my family…and potentially if I write more I will get worse! It is hard, thanks for speaking (I believe) for so many of us…it's a profound topic this one.
Beautiful post Cristian – you describe the need for solitude beautifully… it's always in the quietest moments that we hear our soul – and the soul of others speak…
Dear Cristian~ what I wonder about is a re-frame on your perspective. What if really being alone, being with ourselves fully, engaging in something we love, is being with all of life?
There was neither hammer, nor axe, nor any tool of iron heard.
1 Kings vi, 7.
In absolute silence, like the growth of a palm in the desert, that noble building arose in the symmetry of its fair proportions. But there was plenty of quarrying and hammering and chiseling before the materials were brought to the site. The absolute silence with which the Temple rose is a meet emblem of the progress of the Church, from its foundations laid in the Apostolate towards the top stone, which before very long will be laid upon the completed structure. Amid the rise and fall of dynasties and empires, the Church is being built. Soul after soul, as so many added bricks, is being quietly placed upon the walls. Some day the world will be amazed when it sees the New Jerusalem descend out of heaven from God. The mightiest works of God are the fruit of silence.
Meyer, F.B. (2010-06-07). Our Daily Homily (Kindle Locations 792-798). Unknown. Kindle Edition.
That picture is a perfect addition to your story. I also feel like I am watching life through a tv or movie. I don't look at it as a bad thing. It helps me to observe everything around me as objectively as I can. Great writing!
This post says it all. Thanks
Very interesting, but also very scary.
"To paraphrase Andy Warhol, sometimes I feel as if I’m watching TV. My life is not my own. I don’t know who the people in my life are, and they don’t know me. I’m just an observer. Also, I lost the damn remote control."
Im an observer, constantly in my head and craving solitude :)
Awesome post!
Reblogged this on Mental Love Within the Lines.
This is a very beautiful post!
Cristian, I feel that the company of books and art allow us to pierce through our own solitude and truly encounter what is real and true in each other. People are afraid to open themselves up to one another in direct interaction, even if we all crave to be seen, heard, understood. This is the price of living in society. To be rejected by the group is the greatest fear that most all people share. To reveal one's true self is to risk rejection. Art is a secret diary that we open up to the world, hoping to be embraced, seen as we are for the very first time. The only residual sadness I feel as an artist is the unfulfilled desire to have reflected in a conscious manner in the world the absolute reality that we are all connected to one another. For now, the Internet is the closest approximation to the telepathic web by which we all naturally communicate…unconsciously. We are never truly alone, but I know I often feel alone. The excitement of creating art, of processing thoughts into images and words as they emerge is the most exciting adventure in my life. Thank you for making yourself vulnerable, for sharing your inner world. I respect you and appreciate your work.
This is so well written, and I read it at a point in time where I spend a lot of time in Solitude but I find it to be rather unbearable because of all the noise. Sometimes I just want to interact with others and close out the questions in my mind…but for some strange reason, solitude is something I enjoy! Life is full of many double-edged swords, Solitude is one of them.
Very interesting and well done :)
Kui
Reblogged this on Zeebra Designs & Destinations and commented:
Over the years, one of my struggles was finding a way to help others understand the psyche of an artist. Many don't seem to understand that when an artist is alone and creating, all else fades into the background. For me, that's a beautiful and relaxing place to be, and I treasure those times when I am immersed in my work. Mingling with others and chatting does not marry well with creating art, so in order to tap into the best one can be, that means isolating one's self and going inward. I can happily zip myself away for days or weeks, but then I am ready for a healthy immersion in society so I can reconcile my two selves! Unlike many, I embrace my alone time and never feel lonely.
I am usually not one to reblog, as I feel that the material for my posts should reflect the musings of the Zeebra! Cristian Mihai published a post yesterday that nailed what it's like to be a creative person. He states, "A part of your mind is always some place else… the artist's mind lives as much in the present as it does in the future and the past…' That statement reflects my byline for this blog, 'An artist's eyes never rest.'
Enjoy Cristian's post, Solitude, and enjoy his slant on what it's like to be a creative person.
Z
Thanks. I agree on so many levels.
What she said +1
I have to agree and yet disagree, I love to be alone, I love spending time with myself, but when I am ready to go out and be amongst the masses I love it.
Yup…the more we dive into our loneliness the better the writing becomes! :)
Wow, in honesty this was like reading of myself a little. I'm twenty six, and my "tweet, tween and teen" years albeit, different: I felt much the same. I can walk into a room and connect with almost anyone. The problem Is I don't always feel like there are many people who can connect with me. 1 in a 100 i meet "or so" . I learned to balance this part of myself with a tape recorder on my phone. All those darn fly by words or points, or anything, that catch my fancy. I have to work you know.. lol. We cannot be paid to be bards all the time. The value of words, and literature are now learned by through movies. It does suck to be a part of this national culture, as artists.
Reblogged this on Jaggi.
Being alone. If you cherish it, it's solitude. If you hate it, it's loneliness. :)
Even if we wish for silence, the noise of life still gets to us. But the presence of noise makes life interesting just like silence does.
I was not often sick as a child, but I was an only child with a distant single mother. Very lonely.
It is an interesting question whether childhood solitude nurtures creativity. Thank you for sharing your perspective, it made me feel a little less lonely.
I'm not an artist, not really. I don't write, but I constantly create stories, and new worlds, in my mind. I need solitude, more than most. I have friends, but I've never had a lot of them. I now think that was by unconscious choice, since I need so much alone time. Paradoxically, I still think of myself as a people person.
Great article. I love your insight into your creativity.
Soulful, and spot-on! As a writer i have always juggled the silence and the noise. Over the years i have abandoned one for the other and back again. Today i am learning to balance both. What i can't seem to balance is time!
Reblogged this on bernadetteforshort and commented:
I am reblogging Cristian Mihai post because it resonated so profoundly. Thank you Cristian for sharing your talent.
This has given me the chills, because I can really relate to it. I've always loved spending more time alone than meeting new people, and that's the most thing I hate about myself. My favorite thing to do is to go somewhere alone and just think about my dreams, make up some stories in my mind, worry about my future. Sometimes I feel crazy for having the urge to write about most of the people I meet in my daily life, and I suddenly catch myself writing stories from their perspectives adding alot of things that don't even exist in their lives. I always have so many things going on my mind at the same time, and writing is the only thing that can put my mind in peace. Everytime I write something I feel amazing, I feel like I've become the person I want to be. One of the things I've learnt from writing is that if you want to be an artist being yourself is not always enough, you have to live your life and other people's too.
Whenever I read your blog, I always get more motivated to follow my dream of becoming a writer.Thanks for inspiring me.
[...] Cristian Mihai [...]
I could fall in love with words.. aahhhh.
Interesting to read this tonight Cristian. This is what I jotted down last night, (after years of being in self isolation, facing my fears of facing myself,) "Note to me-once you realize you REALLY have yourself, for better or worse, whatever that feels like for you, you really feel and know you are ok." It took a grisly war movie last night to make me remember that I always have me, as if I have been through the real horrors somewhere in space and time, and now I get to be unafraid alone, or out "on my own." It feels good to get, finally. Thank you so much for sharing this with us. Great validation for the artist in me.
[...] like this, instead of the wrapping paper. • The first Halloween wreath I’ve seen. • Yup. • These are [...]
Absolutely wonderful. I'm speechless in describing how your words touched me.
Your thoughts are absolutely beautiful.
A lifetime back, I used to be the spacey 8 year old sitting on top of the monkey bars during the monsoons with a notebook and pencil waiting for the rain so that she could watch it come in. I can relate to the need for solitude right from when you were a kid.
You write beautifully.
Well, Cristian, I've been following you for a while and have to say that you are right, I disagree with you about great writing having nothing to do with empathy. How did Steinbeck ever turn whores, bums and drunks into saints and apostles if he didn't have empathy? But I still love ya, buddy!
[...] is why I was grateful to read a blog posted this week titled, Solitude by Cristian Mihai. Though writing from a purely secular view, I was refreshed by his reminder [...]
I have just finished writing a play for Charles Dickens 200th birthday year for our Dickens Victorian Village celebration. It includes a lot of history and background on Boz. All of his books are based on experiences in his life and especially the people he watched along the streets of London. He would even attempt to guess what they did for a living, and often followed them home to see where they lived. So sounds to me you are following in some pretty big footsteps. You are definitely a writer!
And writing is life with all the boring bits cut out!
indeed. being a recluse not only gives you the time to craft and write, but is essential to observe, contemplate and create
That is so entirely true – that artists, both literary and visual, hold back some part of themselves so that they are not wholly engaged in what is going on around them but are absorbing what they see and hear for their work. We can be there with you but not entirely. As a visual artist and writer, there is always the part of me that is looking and listening while I seemingly am engaged with wherever I am. It is a selfish way to be but that is the way it is.
This struck a chord in me. Wonderful piece. And to think when I was young, my email was nomad_in_solitude just because my own company is the only company I had.
Love your writing on solitude!
I completely identify with this.
You are never alone. Everything is illusion but at the root we are one – one energy, one being, one universe. It is true most of the people try to avoid listening to their interior voice by small talk and a lot of noise but it doesn't mean they are not lonely. It depends how you see loneliness. And loneliness like being surrounded by people is an illusion. But you are right about spending time alone, away from people and noise. Not only artists need it, also "normal" people do. But few of them realize this and even fewer do it.
Your article is very interesting still I don't think that by reading a book or watching a painting you can find what went through the artist's mind. No matter how good the work is you will see what you want to see and what your being is reflecting. Like a mirror. You can see the good parts if you feel good and the bad parts if you feel bad and only the parts that you see connected to yourself. The thought of "reading" somebody's mind is illusion :)
So very true. Thank you for helping me feel so not alone in my solitude. One thing I would disagree with: you say we lose a bit of our soul each time we write. I believe we share a bit of our infinite soul each time we write. Thank you for the inspiration.
Nicely put, as usual. I believe artists are born with an abundance – of heart, soul, tenacity, wisdom – of all things that bolster the creative spirit – gifts, if you will. Though I agree that pieces of our souls become part of our work and forever inhabit each creation completed and bestowed, I 've always felt that those creations were/are the price we pay; that we give pieces of our souls away. We must. These creations, these pieces of our souls, are gifts. Do we really lose when we love and share that love? I'm really asking. –Zee
I know your subject here is solitude – part of the price – and I should have stuck to it, but you got me thinking, and for that, thanks! Zee
"We don’t want to be alone, we never do, but some of us have to."
So true.
Reblogged this on Life in a Gaggle and commented:
I just… I just. I just sighed, smiled, opened the curtain a bit to let the light of this peek into my heart. Did you know light doesn't bend? That, if the illusion of that happens, it's actually called "inner reflection?" (This has nothing to do with light, per se. Only that this post by Cristian Mihai did that to my heart. Bent around the corner. Said hello. And I'm so thankful for that.)
This is exactly what I was feeling recently. Surrounded by a bunch of colleagues during lunch break and all I hear is bla, blah , blah…chattering. I feel worlds away although I was just right beside them :( Glad to know I'm not alone :')
You hit the nail on the head. I can relate to this. I was exactly the same way as a child. Even as a wife and mother I cherish the alone times during the day.
A mesmerizing piece of writing.
Totally agree with you. Solitude is not loneliness, it is the completeness and peace within yourself ! :)
[...] “We’re born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we’re not alone. “ Orson Welles. Inspired By http://cristianmihai.net/2012/10/17/solitude/ [...]
[...] Solitude (cristianmihai.net) [...]
At a very young age, you achieve a lot. You are awesome artist, very talented.
[...] Solitude « Cristian Mihai Alone, even doing nothing, you do not waste your time. You do, almost always, in company… [...]
In solitude the soul finds voice that otherwise is lost in the storm but when found and laid hold of is not always the comfort one sought after but something more. A piece perhaps to the question that makes us human, why. Why now, why me, why this word or that, why would deep inside of me be the truer self?
peace
jim