There’s always a time of the month when I contemplate the idea of abandoning my dream of becoming a full time writer. It’s a time of the month when I think that I’m just pretending to be a writer, and that I’m not really good enough, and that I should simply give up.
A couple years ago, before I started this blog, one of my uncles asked me about my writing. Back then I was uploading stories on Wattpad, and I was having a lot of fun. So I told him that I had talked with a girl from Etiopia, who said that she really enjoyed my stories. So much that she cried.
And, well, he asked me about money. Was I earning enough?
In fact, I wasn’t making money at all. And I told him that, and I told him that when a stranger genuinely appreciates your art, that’s worth more than all the money in the world.
I was happy back then, in the stupidest way possible.
Hector Herrera ∞ (@hectolux) September 24, 2013
Hector Herrera shared this on Twitter earlier. Even in e-book form, or maybe especially in e-book form, my book does travel quite a lot around the world.
That time of the month when I fell like a fraud is when I have to pay all the bills and stuff, and I realize that I don’t have enough money, simply because I haven’t earned enough. And that’s when I think that somewhere along the line I have failed.
I can only hope, because you know what they say, “Hope dies last.” I can hope that book sales will pick up, or that somehow the books I’m going to release by the end of the year will prove to be more popular than all my previous releases. But, honestly, this feels more and more like playing the lottery.
I know that I’ve written a lot of posts about courage, ambition, perseverance; I know that I’m usually the guy that tries to tell you that you’re dreams are right there for the taking, that what you want can be achieved, that all your impossible dreams can be conquered, so I’m sorry for this post.
I don’t write about it when I get sick, or when I’m heartbroken, or when someone disappoints me. But I do write about everything that influences my art, and I share it with you, because no one else really cares. Which I’m not sure if it’s sad or not.
There’s nothing else to write about, other than the fact that you can help me out with a small donation here. But also, on the same page, you can choose from a number of perks, most of which will help you reach a larger audience. I’m willing to share the stage with you, because, frankly, without you there wouldn’t be a stage to perform on.