Life goes on

“In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on.”Robert Frost

In those moments of true despair, when it feels that we have lost hope for the better, when we have forsaken our passion for life, it’s a bit tricky to look around and see what’s happening to all the others who inhabit your own little story: life does not stop. It goes on. It carries on, no matter what.

And, whether you’re willing to see it and accept it or not, life goes on for you too.

Whether you want it to or not, life goes on. And, slowly, it takes everything away.

Yes, it’s true: pain does not last forever, even if it lasts a lifetime. Sadly, nothing lasts forever. Everything gets lost in the cruel sands of time; everything gets erased.

In fact, I write with this cruel certainty in mind. I know that I am mortal, but at the same time I know that only my actions will reverberate along the years, long after I’m gone. That’s why I write, actually. Hoping that some part of me will endure.

It’s an ironic fate this one: we aim for greatness, we crave for it, and, yet, we only endure.

The past couple of weeks have been terrible. Medical problems, my grandfather incredibly ill in the hospital. Bills to pay, food to buy, and no energy to write.

But life goes on.

Yes, yesterday, after I’ve seen my grandfather at the hospital, looking as bad as I’ve ever seen him, I couldn’t see it. I myself in pain, battling to stay aware enough to find a way, or just to write a few words on this blog, I felt like hope had abandoned me.

But, you see, life’s full of surprises. When you give up on yourself, someone else is usually there, willing to give you hope, to fight for you, to fight alongside you in something that’s not even their battle. I have to thank my girlfriend for that, and even though odds are she may never read these words, I thank her for her care and love.

And all this reminded me of one of my favorite quotes, from The Diary of Anais Nin: “You cannot save people. You can only love them.”

Ultimately, that’s the most you can do, and why wouldn’t it be enough? Why love wouldn’t be the most precious thing we can offer another human being?

And, yes, love does save. In the end, nothing else really matters. This is life’s most profound answer: in the end, love is what actually prevails. Love is the only thing that endures. In many, many forms.

It’s the last week to give donations, and help me with my medical problems. Only $485 left to raise in order to pay for all the medical care I require.

Murray, Gary, Malcolm, Elizabeth, Brett, Linsay, Jessica, and so many others have helped me immensely during the last few days, and for this I want to thank them.

Thank you.

I don’t know what would have happened without you. I don’t even want to think about it.

If you want to help me out, you can contribute any amount you want here.

Once again, thank you,

Cristian

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16 comments on “Life goes on

  1. As always, this is well written and thought provoking. Best wishes to you for the help you need at this time.

  2. Cristian,
    I am so sorry you are going through a bad time. My heart aches for you. What a blessing though to have your girlfriend. After each successive deployment, I became more and more aware just how much life goes on when we have no loved ones around. Love is all that matters. It is what gives us hope to carry on. Some moments are so bleak, we just can’t get up the energy to even go to the bathroom…we can’t even roll out of the bed to shower. I thank Heavenly Father every day that I am no longer there, but I know that things happen and because of my propensity to become depressed it can sneak up on you. It recently did!

    Keep moving. You may feel stagnate. You mat feel like you are loosing ground but you are not. Love from others makes it so much sweeter when you come out. I am glad you shared your thoughts! I am glad you motivated just enough to post this. I think the more we talk about bad times, the more people will love one another as He wants us too! My prayers are with you!
    ~michele

  3. I understand pain; both the physical and the mental.
    Chronic physical pain changes our brain structure, it erodes hope, it dilutes joy. Added to that, financial stressors, and yeeHAW! It’s a terrible, painfilled, bumpy ride.

    As soon as I get some money, myself, I will donate what I can. I have a spinal cord injury, myself, so I really do understand, unrelenting pain. It’s a helluva thing to have to deal with, and for each of us, it is different. It bothers me, when people discount their own pain. As if what I suffer is worse. I don’t think so, myself.
    I think that how we are affected depends upon the individual.

    I do know, that emotional pain is just as bad, sometimes worse, than physical pain. The nociceptor pathway in the spinal cord is activated by severe emotional pain, which sets those neurotransmitters in overdrive.

    I say this because I want to point out that what you feel is real, you’d be surprised how many doubt themselves, that think they are further “defective” because not only are they having a hard time, but it’s hard to believe without the education, that emotion can cause real pain.

    I hope that this all goes well, and I hope to contribute as soon as I can.

  4. mommalisaof2 says:

    I am so thankful that God strategically places people in our lives at the right times. I have experienced the love of someone “carrying me through” when I couldn’t go any further by myself. Hold tight. Continue to fight.

  5. Right there with you this week. Just blogged something sort of similar, in fact. You were right: when you can’t find yourself, someone else does.

  6. “and that has made all the difference”

  7. mpreeti says:

    God be with you, and may you continue to find hope and strength within you and those around you. Stay strong!

  8. Love and Positive thinking and friends will save the day

  9. Reading your article, I instinctively thought of the poem ‘Ozymandias.’ The fickleness and unpredictability of time and life has always frightened me. But, I guess we have to learn to accept it. Having said this, I also want to extend my best wishes and prayers. Hope things in your life get sorted out soon.

  10. egehlin says:

    Best wishes Cristian. Don’t give up…there is always a way…there is always someone to help you through the bad times.

  11. Beautifully written! Most people think it’s others that save them, when really you save yourself, yes they give you hope but only you can decide to change what’s around you or how you feel.

    Life moves on and so do we, wishing you and your grandad well :)

  12. So true. Hope you can get the money you need.

  13. asmukti says:

    Hi Chris,

    I found this post provoked a couple of questions..

    Is time necessarily cruel, or is this definition subjective? Also, what is it that we ever really have for time to take away?

    Just some thoughts (ironically) and completely rhetorical. Cheers,

    asmukti :)

  14. shreey1234 says:

    You write very well and your words pierce the heart so easily. Wonderful,,just keep writing:)

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