What I learned from years of high functioning depression, anxiety, and low self-esteem

Disclaimer: this is going to be a long and (somewhat) harsh post about certain realities of life most of us are trying to evade by all means possible.

I am not writing this post out of empathy. I am not writing this post because I read some articles and now I am trying to pass along the knowledge.

I am writing this article because I understand.

I understand the difference between the burning pain of suffering deeply and the general apathy and hopelessness of depression. The emptiness. The lack of interest, joy, passion. I understand the despair, the loneliness, the reluctance to discuss about it all, the very fatiguing job of hiding it all behind a smile, or an “I’m fine” delivered in the worst way possible. Continue reading

closer: a novel

closer is the story of a man who is so seduced by the desire to get rich that he becomes involved in a world where anything is permitted. His journey to the top is interrupted by the consequences of his past actions. Things become darker, more violent and more sexually disturbing than he could ever have imagined as he tries to break himself free from his past.

Deft, shocking and unforgettable, this gripping tale about risk, consequence and the treacherous balance between the two reveals a world where there’s nothing to separate right from wrong.

***

If that description is not enough, I’d like to say that closer is not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. It’s more like a shot of whiskey. There are parts that describe certain aspects of beauty — the way we perceive something or someone around us as being beautiful — but then I insist on breaking your heart.

Stare at something long enough, there’s nothing magic left of it. Truth is, nothing in this world is as beautiful as we can imagine it. Continue reading

Dome: Episode One [FREE DOWNLOAD]

A heartbreaking portrayal of ambition, betrayal, and intrigue, Dome is a serialized Science-Fiction Thriller that tells the story of a small group of people who try to figure out the reason behind the construction of this dome-city in the center of the world’s harshest continent.

Prologue

For a man who knows that our worst nightmares are about to come true, Jack Riddell has no trouble sleeping at night. “It is said that Caesar wept when he found out about Pompey’s death.”

“What’s that got to do with anything?” the host of the show, a woman in her mid-thirties, asks. For the last hour or so, the richest man in the world has avoided giving her a straight answer.

Jack laughs. “A man’s character is determined by how he reacts in the face of adversity. By how strong his enemies are.” Ignoring the dumbfounded expression of the host, he adds, “I believe people should realize Dome is a simple reminder that we can fight against insurmountable odds and win.” Continue reading

What I learned in five years of blogging

Five years. Five years of daily blogging. Five years since I decided to never give up, no matter what. To keep writing, to keep blogging, to just keep at it for as long as it took.

And what a ride it has been. Around the world, indeed. 200 or so countries. Lots and lots of people, lots and lots of stories… Continue reading

If He Doesn’t Give You Closure, He’s A Coward

You could have just told her things weren’t “working out”. You could have done so many other things but no, you decided the worst route of them all. Breaking her heart came awfully easy for you… Don’t you think?

To make her miserable and make her have to deal with you not loving her was a heartless game… Dude, she loved you. If you didn’t love her anymore it would have been much easier if you had just left. Or you know, maybe said you didn’t love her anymore?

You literally dragged her through the dirt until she was going insane over it. How can you treat someone you used to love like that?

[READ MORE]

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38 Minutes in Hawaii

Walker Edwards

What do you do when you wake up to a text informing you of an incoming ballistic missile?

First of all, you surprise yourself.

It wasn’t so much panic or fear that gripped me, but a melancholic sort of clarity. The morning sky seemed all the bluer, and every joke that passed from the mouths of me and my friends seemed all the funnier.

My breakfast tasted far better than it ever had before.

It just so happened that I was with my closest friends, in a beautiful place, and so my mind didn’t provide much in the way of a plan of action. Rather, I seemed rooted to where I stood. Very little was in question; a missile might well be on its way, and well, there wasn’t much we could do about that.

“Keep Calm and Carry On” entered into my internal dialogue and stuck around there as…

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Last chance

Hi guys,

Last day to take advantage of this super sale on my e-store. Advertising options, e-books, paperbacks, and more, all of them are 50% off.

Simply used discount code SALE50. That’s it.

What is there on this e-store?

Advertising options:

  • Reblogs: for those of you who want to reach a bigger audience.
  • Reviews: for those of you who want your book reviewed by me.
  • Interviews: for those of you who’d like to be interviewed by me.

Books:

  • The E-book Bundle: download six e-books for only $9.99. Quite the deal.
  • Signed Paperback Bundlefive signed paperbacks. Oh, wait. There’s a bit more than that. Five short essays included. Stuff you don’t get to read anywhere else. Oh, and… yeah… Free International Shipping.

Of course, there’s the Mentorship Program I announced earlier today, at the incredibly low price of $49.99. Only five more spots available.

Don’t forget: use discount code SALE50 for 50% off.

You’ve got to love yourself

“Your opinion of yourself becomes your reality. If you have all these doubts, then no one will believe in you, and everything will go wrong. If you think the opposite, the opposite will happen. It’s that simple. The higher your self-belief, the more your power to transform reality. Having supreme confidence makes you fearless and persistent, allowing you to overcome obstacles that stop most people in their tracks.” – Robert Greene

Do you know this cliche that the world acts as a mirror? We see what we want to see; what we expect to happen becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy and will inevitably happen?

Well, it’s true.

If you don’t love yourself, why should anyone else? If you don’t trust yourself, how can you expect others to trust you? Relying on external validation never lasts.

But you know what lasts? Continue reading

Hi guys,

So only five spots left in the Mentorship Program. If you’d like to know more about it, you can go here.

Also, the next person who orders anything from my e-store will be the 500th client and will receive a gift: anything they choose from the e-store. The fastest man wins the prize.

So, yeah, go check it out.

Jumped…

Well-Written Overthinking

Laying in the dark all alone, only the cold white light of my laptop precariously balanced on the edge of my bed, keeping me company. My face is buried in my pillow…the same mustard yellow pillow that gave me so much joy the night before.

It’s back. The dread, the lump in your throat, the tears that just won’t back down. It’s like a fast-paced walk down a dark alley, the start of a scary movie or the blurred objects in the dark. I’m being jumped. Not by school bullies, not by thieves, but by my mind. My own mind taunts me in the night. Yet, this is the same mind that comprehends a smile and remembers your birthday and your favourite colour…Yes, it’s not my choice.

And this is my mind… it is threatened and surprised by anxiety. Tomorrow I may be well and calm and full of love and joy and…

View original post 16 more words

Hi guys,

This weekend, from Friday to Sunday, a super sale occurs on my e-store. Advertising options, e-books, paperbacks, and more, all of them are 50% off.

Simply used discount code SALE50. That’s it.

What is there on this e-store?

Advertising options:

  • Reblogs: for those of you who want to reach a bigger audience.
  • Reviews: for those of you who want your book reviewed by me.
  • Interviews: for those of you who’d like to be interviewed by me.

Books:

  • The E-book Bundle: download six e-books for only $9.99. Quite the deal.
  • Signed Paperback Bundlefive signed paperbacks. Oh, wait. There’s a bit more than that. Five short essays included. Stuff you don’t get to read anywhere else. Oh, and… yeah… Free International Shipping.

Of course, there’s the Mentorship Program I announced earlier today, at the incredibly low price of $49.99. Only five more spots available.

Don’t forget: use discount code SALE50 for 50% off.