I started writing when I was thirteen years old. I thought it would be easy. I thought that all you needed was a brilliant idea…

First story I ever got the courage to let someone else read it… they called me a retard. They said it was so bad that I should give up writing.

First book I ever self-published: sold two e-book and two paperback copies, received two reviews, and that was it. I had it unpublished.

My second try with self-publishing? Sold 3 e-copies of a short story in the first month, earning $1.05 before taxes.

First try at blogging? Quit after three days.

First try at quitting smoking? Lasted for a month.

First time I went to the gym? Lasted for three days. Second time? About a week.

I have failed, over and over again, and I keep failing, and that is the key to becoming successful at anything in life.

You only fail if you quit.

Right now, I am at my lowest.

Some struggles you can win by yourself, others… you need a bit of help.

With my medical bills and all the surgeries and all that stuff, and… the bills and all the medicine… and the general struggle of trying to raise funds for those things have left a toll on me.

People just don’t care.

And all I am asking is for them to care enough to donate a small amount. Any amount.

Be it one dollar, five, ten, or a thousand, it is appreciated just the same.

It matters the same.

A lot.

It helps me get the treatment that I need.

Sometimes I think this is not a life worth living. Who lives like this? Who struggles to chew almost anything at all? Who spends his nights in pain, wishing it to go away, just so he can fall asleep?

Maybe someone can understand.

Maybe someone wishes to help out.

If yes, who wants to, can donate any amount they see fit via PayPal here.


5 thoughts on “Failure

  1. Just do not quit. “Tub Thumping” by Chumba Wamba; listen to it every day. And keep doing what you love to do or dream of doing. Or dare to do. Otherwise, die. Those are your choices. Give up or keep going. That’s life. That’s it. Give up now or find a way to keep going towards your dreams. I choose life. Do the same. Never say die. Never ever quit. Just keep swimming. Dream your dreams and put a goal in front of you to complete … no matter how small and be grateful … you can still chew.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. It’s all about perseverance. You got that is spades. About the medical bills — do your best it will come. Keep writing. I just took a course that said to get good, you have to be willing to fail. This was a pretty good piece, so you’ve got this


  3. I can relate to the hospital bills piling up on you. My husband had rods put in his back many years ago. They got infected. In addition, below the rods his spine was deteriorating. He needed surgery, but only after he was infection free. At first it looked like he wasn’t going to make it. We have new bills coming in monthly. STILL. And his surgery was in December.


  4. Cristian, I agree with everything everyone is saying. I know all about things going wrong, frustration with life and with writing and people seeming not to care or understand, and everything else.We don’t mean to not care, and you are right to tell us. I have ordered your book and the one review makes it sound interesting to me. I would prefer to purchase something and review and tell people if I enjoy it rather than a direct donation, as this is more positive. I wish you all the very best. And please, please chose life.

    Liked by 2 people

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