Why a heartbreak is the best thing that can happen to (for) you

Business gurus will tell you that failure is an integral part of success. Just so you remember you are mortal. You are not invincible. You will fail, you will have to try over and over again.

The same principle applies to love. You need to get your heart broken.


Because it’s the only way one can grow.

Let me explain.

Boy meets girl. Boy hopelessly falls in love. Girl soon feels the same about him. They spend a while together, and then one of them decides it’s no longer worth it, and they leave.

 The outcome is the same: pain, bitterness, regret…

What is wrong with you?

How could they do such a thing?



And so on and so forth… with a bit of tears (or more of them) and a lot of questions.

Some folks choose to never find out the answers to those questions, while others decide other people are stupid and can’t appreciate a good thing when they see it.

But a few will learn from this. A few will strive to understand things.

Yes, it is a very painful process.

Depression and anxiety kicks in.

You stop taking care of yourself, for what is the purpose?

You pretend you’re okay on the outside, but you’re slowly dying on the inside.

But you learn… you do.

You kind of understand, after a while, that happiness and self worth are not for sale. That you cannot be truly yourself if you have to look in the hearts and minds of others for validation.

You understand that it is important to be the best version that you can be.

You now know never to become complacent, never to settle.

To do more. To aspire for more.

Because you’ll be dead soon enough anyway.

Because when hearts break, death seems like a mild nuissance.

It is life that is truly terrifying. Complex beyond belief.

If it was simple before your heart shattered into a million pieces, now you’ve got to grab all those pieces and somehow glue them back together.

Some of you might argue that a broken heart is no longer as strong.

I beg to differ.

Hearts break only once. The rest are just scratches.


20 comments on “Why a heartbreak is the best thing that can happen to (for) you

  1. tiannaavant1 says:

    Obsessed with “Hearts break only once. The rest are just scratches.” So true! beautiful job.

  2. Heartbreak is an opportunity to rise and shine and forge ahead for what lies ahead…as weird as it may sound, heartbreak should be a celebration….celebrating an end to what wasn’t working anymore

  3. I’ve had my share of obstacles but I do have to say that I strongly believe that the toughest experiences offer most knowledge.

  4. heartbreak is what makes you. It teaches you the biggest lesson in life, that it’s not how fast you can be knocked down, but how long you decide to stay down before picking yourself up.

  5. floatinggold says:

    Something can be learned from anything!

  6. Sudi R. says:

    Couldn’t be more relateable! Especially the last line “Hearts break only once. The rest are just scratches.”

    This post is perfect 🙌🏽

  7. Karishma says:

    I agree learn and grow from pain ..👍❤️

  8. A great lesson…👍👍..but I think we cannot break our hearts voluntarily to be strong the next time we get into love

  9. I can testify to the first time breaking and the rest scratches. It’s never the same after the first time. Written with compassion and understanding. Thank you Cristian

  10. A bitter truth..(y) nice lines buddy !!

  11. mika says:

    Not sure if I completely agree with the scratches.. what would it be the one that caused you heartbreak on the journey of life? Are there any heartbreaks in the end!? (Good story!)

  12. joykuse says:

    Hearts don’t break only once! Each time you fall in love with a different person and that love has to end mysteriously, one’s heart is broken. A broken heart is no longer strong until it chooses to put itself together, once again. The only thing I am sure of is that it takes time for some people to cope up and love again. Your article is indeed provoking one to give their own experiences on how they managed to clear the scratches of their heart.

  13. SonniQ says:

    There is another angle to this boy meets girl scenario and why it doesn’t work. Each puts on their best face to make the other “fall in love with them”, to think they are fun and interesting to be around. After a period of time when impressing each other is no longer needed they relax and their true nature comes out. One may say to the other, “You’ve changed.” But they haven’t. They are just showing their true colors. If the face they put on is to hard to keep up they will end up breaking up – but it doesn’t mean it hurts any less and yes, they need to grow and acquire a little wisdom or they will keep attracting the same kind of person into their life again.

  14. LOVED THIS POST! 😍😍😍

    You see, Christian, you ARE absolutely correct in assuming that MOST people walk out of a relationship broken and subdued. There really is not much left in their lives to keep going on for. Or at least that’s what they LIKE to believe. Either way, it’s the funeral of some of the best years of their lives. And people need such a reminder as yours every once in a while to keep them sane.



  15. Very beautiful post. You made me think about my first heartbreak. I have to agree with you, heartbreak teaches you a lesson. Once you get that lesson you know not to make that same mistake twice.

  16. kemibon says:

    Okay. Nice perspective. Easier said than done but nice and worth trying.

  17. Beautiful thoughts and very astute. Thank you for your words!

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