“The mind is its own place, and in itself can make a heaven of hell, a hell of heaven…” – John Milton, Paradise Lost
Have you ever met someone who, objectively speaking, has it all, yet they are miserable, depressed, anxious? Have you ever met someone who is constantly seeking out problems, creating issues where they don’t exist, overreacting, overthinking, and spending most of their time trying to identify what exactly is wrong with their lives?
Have you ever met someone who could be happy and fulfilled if only they’d give up on a bad habit or addiction? Yet, even though they ask for help and always talk about changing their ways, they never do so.
Known Hells > Unknown Heavens
I’ve long believed that hell isn’t somewhere you get sent to after a life of treachery, malice, and deceit. No. Hell is something you carry around with you. It is a state of mind. It is the consequences of your actions. It is the way the world reacts to your thoughts.
And I believe that there are an awful lot of people living in hell right now. And even if offered the chance to escape, they’d decline it.
The gambler who somehow gets a chance to start anew, debt free, always manages to screw up. The ex-smoker who counts the days until he’ll start again. The person who could go to the police and get out of that abusive relationship, but never does because they are hoping the other person will change.
Hell is, most often than not, something of our own making. And we prefer known hells to unknown heavens.
We fear change so much that we are willing to suffer until the day we die just so we don’t step outside of our comfort zones.
Such a pity.
“Pressure can burst a pipe, or pressure can make a diamond.” – Robert Horry
I was born rather fragile. Or so my parents thought. They tried to shield me from anything that could potentially harm me. They made sure that almost everything could harm me as I grew up.
After all, the mind requires stimulation in the form of adversity. A hell of your own choosing. Doing what is hard now ensures an easy life later.
If you go through life wishing for comfort, your brain will compensate by creating a problem to overcome. One that doesn’t make much sense, because it’s just your brain rebelling against itself.
Our obsession with chasing happiness and this fear of being punched in the face actually weakens us mentally.
Shielding the mind from any adversity makes us more vulnerable to anxiety, panic and chaos.
I have written about my own battle with depression.
The more I wanted things to be easy, simple, predictable, comfortable, the more discomfort I got. It was ridiculous, in a way. And most of it was of my own doing, yes.
Stagnation made it so that I couldn’t even think of ways to solve even the most simple of problems. I’d postpone them over and over again until they became the kind of problems that I couldn’t solve them anymore.
The truth is… no one told me. I had the wrong map and it was leading me in the wrong direction.
By accident I stumbled upon the benefits of doing the hard thing. The grind. The battle royal between your desire for comfort and your need for discomfort. I developed grit by going to the gym on a daily basis. I am not made for something like this. My skeletal muscles are weak, so I am in pain on a daily basis. Or used to be. For a long time.
After a few years of this, I started to purposefully look for things that were difficult. To see every challenge as an opportunity, every obstacle as a way to an improved me.
It’s funny: now I welcome adversity. The soreness I feel upon awakening, knowing that it is the aftermath of spending two hours in the gym every single morning. The “battle wounds” I have from my boxing training…
Think about it this way: how do you stop a guy who enjoys being punched in the face? Who enjoys the struggle? Who expects things to be tough? How do you beat someone who doesn’t give up?
Adversity actually makes you more creative. Smarter. Literally. It activates a part of you that is often latent. Choosing to exit your comfort zone not only stops your brain from trying to eat itself, but it grows it.
We as human beings need resistance, adversity, and pain to break and transform. We are both the marble and the sculptor. We must either focus all our energy on growth against adversity now, or suffer the consequences of stagnation later.
Heaven is the state of mind that having to walk through hell is inevitable. A hell of your own choosing. A hell that you come to understand, that you even appreciate because only by walking through hell do you deem yourself worthy of seeing heaven.
“No tree, it is said, can grow to heaven unless its roots reach down to hell.” – Carl G. Jung
🤯
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Wow this post is so amazing! Thankyou so very much for sharing.
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Wow that was great!
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Hi.
Great Post.
Enjoyed this deep down.
Inside…
Where both Heaven and Hell.
Reside in deed. Indeed
“The mind is a universe and can make a heaven of hell, a hell of heaven.”
John Milton.
So writ.
Choices. We have.
Thanks much for this…
Hope too You value
the Walk. Thru’ both.
… and then Write. Mores.
Take Care. Till next… Shiro.
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“Hell ain’t a bad place, Hell is from here to eternity” Iron Maiden
I fully agree. We make it in ourselves on a daily basis, and fight to keep it that way.
🙂
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I agree, adversity makes us strong. anyone fighting through difficult things, I say “keep moving forward” becoming stagnant is going to kill you, not whatever it is that is keeping you back. great write. 🙂
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Thank you.
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Our obsession with chasing happiness and this fear of being punched in the face actually weakens us mentally.
Absolutely true. Happiness is not an end goal, it is a state of mind, that does not need to depend on the circumstances. I have some people quite happy despite what I can only call adverse circumstances–poverty, illness, loss of opportunity.
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This really resonates with me. I frequently remind myself that if I obsessively seek out comfort and ease in life, it will never come and I will never be satisfied.
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Great piece
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Thank you
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“We prefer known hells to unknown heavens.” So true!!
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Very awesome post! I completely agree, I see heaven and hell as a state of mind.
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Thank you.
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You’ve always got something to say, which those see that they are not alone, others feel in a similar way…
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Yes, indeed!
The mind is a very powerful tool and can definitely be the living quarters of a person’s hell/heaven.
I also do believe that heaven/hell are actual places you are sent to after life.
It would be a shame to live and die in helll….
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It would also be a shame to live in hell, certain you’ll spend eternity in heaven, for it to be nothing at all.
Who knows… tricky stuff.
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I hope you search to discover if heaven and hell are real.. or just a metaphor..
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We all go on that search. Sooner or later. Whether we want to or not.
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Everyone is supposed itself a pure man. That makes heaven for itself and makes hell for other. Whatever he or she does, it seems good to them whether that is right or wrong
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Maybe it is true. Maybe we want heaven so much that we do not care if others have to live in hell…
And I think that there are those who’d drag us all to hell, one by one, if only they could get what they want.
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If we want to get heaven for us then we should sacrifice our things for others but isn’t all.
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Loved this Mihai……💛💛💛💛 Growing accustomed to hell to reach heaven 😊😊
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Thank you!
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This was exactly what I needed to read. Thank you so much!
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Thank you, Emma! For reading and for commenting!
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I rather got to heaven than hell. Now or later? If my last days are numbered, I’d do the things I enjoy now. The things I don’t can be done later; after I’m gone.
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What a wonderful Post is this Cristian.
I was astound when you said ”We are both the marble and the sculptor.” So true it is.
Your last Para
”Heaven is the state of mind that having to walk through hell is inevitable. A hell of your own choosing. A hell that you come to understand, that you even appreciate because only by walking through hell do you deem yourself worthy of seeing heaven.”
This makes us understand Heaven and Hell are in our own minds.
I only wish many people read this Post.
Thanks Mihai
Fond Regards
Shiva
🌷🎶
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Thank you, Shiva!
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I find this to be very true. I’m sharing this to as many as I can, for I always feel people are in cycles… they have cycles that they will get stuck in and repeat over and over. That’s similar to what you describe as your version of Hell. And to get out of it, the cycle must be broken – even if breaking the cycle is uncomfortable. You explained it very, very well.
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Thank you.
Well, breaking out of hell is supposed to be hard. Change is hard, for we are both the marble and the sculptor.
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Reblogged this on Walking the Blade and commented:
Do not run from adversity, for it makes you stronger. Do not shield your children from hardship, you make them weaker. Break bad cycles – even if it makes you uncomfortable… otherwise, you will not grow. Yes – this blog post is worth the read for everyone.
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Love this. Thank you. I to have battled depression my entire lf
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