Success is this: the ability to play the hand you’re dealt like it’s the hand you wanted.
Life is kind of unpredictable. Roller-coaster from hell gone mad kind of unpredictable. Lots and lots of ups and downs, of stress, of pain and suffering and obstacles. Also, our minds play tricks on us and it seems that it is far easier to focus on the bad, on what we have yet to have, on faults and flaws, on the bad memories.
It’s easy to get caught up in all of this and spend your days being miserable and wishing things were different. But, newsflash, wishing doesn’t do anything. Does not change things. It just gives you something to do, while ignoring the reality of the world around you, while life passes you by.
Hence, the importance of reframing.
Cognitive reframing is a psychological technique that consists of identifying and then disputing irrational or maladaptive thoughts. Reframing is a way of viewing and experiencing events, ideas, concepts and emotions to find more positive alternatives.
Thank you, Wikipedia, for this definition. Couldn’t have said it better myself.
A way of viewing and experiencing events to find more positive alternatives.
Laptop breaks? Well, it’s nice because I can buy or new one. Or I’ll just use pen and paper to write my stories.
Girlfriend leaves you? Well, there’s your chance to find someone even better. To spend more time doing what you love, developing a hobby or passion, or improving yourself.
Any negative event can be reframed.
But here’s the trick: do this in such a way that allows you to play the hand like it is the one you’ve always wanted.
Don’t do stuff like this.
The way you interpret reality should aid you in becoming your best self. Should inspire you to act. Nothing is so terrible that can’t be fixed in a certain way, nothing is so great that you have nothing else to improve upon.
You can be terrified by the thought of you dying one day, or you can be motivated by it.
You can let all that you do not know stand in the way of success, or you can just learn.
Failure? It’s just an experience that will help you become better.
It’s not what happens that matters, but how you interpret what happens. It’s how you react. It’s what you learn from the experience.
If your fiancé cheated on you, then it’s up to you to decide if you ever want to date someone again, if all the people are cheaters and liars, if you are so damaged that you’re not worth loyalty and honesty.
A million ways to experience life, and people choose to most negative and harmful one.
Reframe your misfortune before your misfortune becomes the only thing that defines you.