“Where are the people?” resumed the little prince at last. “It’s a little lonely in the desert…”
“It is lonely when you’re among people, too,” said the snake.” – Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
It is said loneliness does not mean having no one around. Being utterly and inconsolably alone. No. Loneliness is the inability to communicate what you feel is important to those around you. Being constantly misunderstood.
Funny.
They say birds of a feather flock together. They say that we become alike the five people we spend most time with. Yet, sometimes, we find ourselves among people who make us feel lonely.
I do not feel lonely by myself. I have lots of stuff to do. I keep myself busy. I keep myself learning. There’s a lot of things to do by yourself. But sometimes I felt lonely… lonely beyond any possible translation.. among other people. At parties and such. I would write stories in my head. I would imagine the comfort of my home waiting for me. I just had to wait a few more hours.
It is, indeed, lonely among people too.
But I dare ask: do the people who make you feel lonely… are they really your people? Your kind of people? Are they really the ones you’d do anything to spend time with?
Whatever is the answer you find, that’s also the cure for loneliness.
The way I see it, loneliness is an yearning for a certain kind of connection. It’s the desire to be understood by another. To be trusted, to trust in return.
We desire meaning above everything else when it comes to other people.
We oftentimes forget this.
We. The People. We, the lonely among so others just like us.
Such a sad truth, isn’t it?
That we are more than ever before, yet we feel lonely like never before.
While we spend time and resources on finding cures for diseases of the body, we should also allocate the same amount of effort into finding cures for diseases of the soul. For they are intimately related.
Many times I am lonelier in a group of people than when it’s just me. Finding that person who really knows you is like winning the lottery. Peace
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“That we are more than ever before, yet we feel lonely like never before.”
I couldn’t have said it any better. Funny, I’ve been working on a blog post about this very same idea – feeling lonely even when surrounded by people, sometimes even your most dearest friends and family. Thank you for sharing this.
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Odd thought but I have noticed that people, personally known, who describe feeling lonely don’t seem to share this experience in the woods when they walk alone.
My personal question I ruminate on a lot is then: are they lonely around others because they don’t get enough alone time?
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No they are not my people…but I love you writing…😍😊😉
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I’ve had occasion to wonder at the people who tend to use violence, especially mass shooters and such. All of them seem to be incredibly alone. Makes you wonder.
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“Being constantly misunderstood”, this single statement hit a bit close to home
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Well said.
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Thank you, Athena!
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I feel more alone in a crowd than when I’m by myself.
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You can have a significant other and still feel lonely, loneliness is a lack of communication. Start communicating and you’ll Stop feeling lonely.
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As I read this posting, the mind cascades in a lot of directions. Which path to go down? So many!
There’s time in the loneliness to pick and choose, back track and try another…and another. Down each, we see, feel and learn. Bringing it out for others to see? We test, revise and innovate…together.
Some might not believe in what is “Holistic.” It’s just a simple word that means…the whole of it…all the parts and the interconnected paths that connect them all. Given time, we will explore…share…work it out together even if it begins in the lonely times that do eventually meet up within the whole.
Holistic…it’s not so complicated…given time. Body, mind…spirit, and maybe even soul (shrug). There’s time…I think.
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This is really true. It’s sad to think about how many people suffer from loneliness. We can each help other by being true to those around us. When we embrace a conversation with another, we are capable of leaving that person feeling accepted and an important part of life in general. Let’s try to think about this when we are out and about. Let’s set out to make others feel that they matter.
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This reminds me of something I read (I think it was from World Economic Forum…?) about a program in Holland which has students living with seniors to help them stave off loneliness!
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Right – the people who cause me to feel lonely are not my people. Thanks for putting it out there so clearly.
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Well said, Bravo!
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Thank you, Krista!
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I actually enjoy being alone but I feel lonely when I’m with my classmates. Maybe, because I don’t connect with most of them. But it gets worse when my friends get along well with them.
That’s when I wonder if my friends are really my people.
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Maybe they are not, but there’s plenty of time to find your people. Heck. It takes an awful lot of time to even figure out who your people are.
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Yes, I’ve been told it takes years to find my people. To find my actual friends.
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