On Darkness and Light

blessing

“It’s so much darker when a light goes out than it would have been if it had never shone.” – John Steinbeck

They say change is the only true constant in our lives. Defined as the process through which something becomes different. Some of us fight it, others choose to focus their energy on adapting to the new circumstances; to make the most out of whatever it is that has changed.

Change is inevitable.

There’s good and bad in our lives. There’s good and bad in the world around us. How we react to all that is entirely up to us.

But what I really what to write about is the so called “blessing in disguise.”

I was raised in an upper middle class family. My father worked in the restaurant business. We never had to worry about food or clothes or, basically, anything. Just about the time I was in high school my father was earning just enough so I could turn into a real spoiled brat.

But then things changed. My father’s business went bankrupt. We struggled for a while. I blamed pretty much all the things imaginable for what was happening. But that’s also when I started to really write. Like really, really write.

I decided that I won’t give up. I started this blog. I self-published short stories and novels. I ran an online magazine for a while.

I did this on my own, something that would have never even crossed my mind hadn’t it been for the difficult situation that my family went through. What happened wasn’t my fault, but what I did because of it (or in spite of it) was my own doing.

I chose to fight against the darkness, because I thought there was no pride or glory in accepting my fate. It wasn’t easy. It wasn’t beautiful. I wasn’t waking up in the morning eager to get work done. It was painful. It was the real deal. The struggle.

It was my fight for survival.

Yes, I know, in this century it seems rather bizarre to talk about survival, but, truth me told, we all have moments when we have to fight for our own survival. Or our sanity. Or just keeping it together long enough for the storm to pass.

Right now… I’m not sure if the storm passed. Things changed… maybe I’m staring at the aftermath of that storm. But what I do know for sure is that I changed. I am a different person, one I would never have decided to become were it otherwise.

That is the real purpose behind anything that happens to us. Things change in order to change us. Or the other way around.

Of course, we also like to believe that we can always decide who we want to be, but most times something has to happen to make us genuinely want to become that kind of person. A kick in the butt, so to speak.

Or a blessing in disguise.

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9 thoughts on “On Darkness and Light

  1. I’m unsure there is true darkness, just like a Rembrandt painting. There is not black; there are shadows and always something in them. Discerning and understanding them can improve us as artists and human beings.

    Like

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