Depression. Suicide. Courage.

The so-called ‘psychotically depressed’ person who tries to kill herself doesn’t do so out of quote ‘hopelessness’ or any abstract conviction that life’s assets and debits do not square. And surely not because death seems suddenly appealing. The person in whom Its invisible agony reaches a certain unendurable level will kill herself the same way a trapped person will eventually jump from the window of a burning high-rise. Make no mistake about people who leap from burning windows. Their terror of falling from a great height is still just as great as it would be for you or me standing speculatively at the same window just checking out the view; i.e. the fear of falling remains a constant. The variable here is the other terror, the fire’s flames: when the flames get close enough, falling to death becomes the slightly less terrible of two terrors. It’s not desiring the fall; it’s terror of the flames. And yet nobody down on the sidewalk, looking up and yelling ‘Don’t!’ and ‘Hang on!’, can understand the jump. Not really. You’d have to have personally been trapped and felt flames to really understand a terror way beyond falling. – David Foster Wallace

Written by someone who ended up hanging himself, I think he knew what he was talking about.

Deciding to end one’s life needs quite a lot of contemplating on the subject. And, truth of the matter, we could debate the accuracy of such a description and all aspects of depression and suicide until the end of time, without arriving at a certain conclusion.

Maybe it’s got to do with emotional resilience. Maybe it’s got to do with neurological damage, with hormones and stuff.

We have yet to understand the human mind, and it is a wonder we are the only bit of this world aware of itself, and we haven’t died out as a result of being unable to cope with such a thing.

But this post is not about these sort of things. This post is about those who actively try to bellitle such things as depression or suicide. Truth be told, as much empathy as you have, you still can’t go inside someone’s brain and feel what they are feeling.

One man’s floor is another man’s ceiling.

The road to hell is paved with good intentions, adverbs, and people who denied the truth for far too long.

Mental health is important.

How important you ask?

Well, our success is never generated by our abolities, but rather by our beliefs of said abilities.

What you think, you become.

I know, I know. Such cliches.

But sad part about cliches is that while you are rolling your eyes or dismissing them, they are inefably true.

The mind matters the most. Our way of thinking influences our behavior and actions.

Jumping off a bridge is the result of a pattern of thinking. A pattern that needs to be addressed. A person needs support and help, not a quick dismissal on the basis of “other people have it worse” or “toughen up” or “don’t be such a crybaby.”

It is important to be kind to others, not so they are kind to us in return, but because we know not what said people are going through.

I know, I know. I used a lot of cliches today. But they are more than true, and more than apt at describind a course of action that might address some of the harm we have inflicted upon ourselves and others.

Funny fact: we humans are the only ones who harm others for fun. For the enjoyment of it. For the ecstasy and the adrenaline rush.

And you think depressed people are the ones who have issues?

Published by Cristian Mihai

Became Internet famous by the age of 23. Never recovered. I write short author bios all over the web. I’m an acquired taste. Don’t like me? Acquire some taste.

49 Comments

  1. I think everyone has to face the darkness at some point in their lives. I have come out of the other side of depression and was forced to return and retrieve my wife when her time came. One thought sustained me. “What if tomorrow is better and I miss out because I gave up today?” Little by little I grew stronger in Spirit until one day I realized that the darkness had gone without my noticing it.

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  3. All that has been said via this post is so right! We people repeatedly fail to understand what a depressed person feels…..And certainly for them it is less painful to die than to live. Apparently, mental health is really an important topic that needs to be discussed more openly and never to be ignored as ultimately it can lead to fatal consequences.

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  4. Very well written.
    Really now people make fun of other people to have fun. They even don’t think about them that from what they are dealing with. People have to grow their mentality. Few days ago I watched a video on Instagram, where one people saying wrong things to another person but the guy who was just crossing from they way, he came to that guy who was saying wrong things and told him to walk away and pushed him. Then he hugged that guy whom that person saying wrong things. I loved that video and thought why every person don’t learn this and help each other rather making jokes on them.

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  5. Gosh! There is so much that I could say here. Too much to pinpoint one thing actually. I agree with so much of what you say, especially the things that are too terrible to contemplate. Throwing yourself out of a window or burning to death in the flames. Yes, we have seen people falling from burning skyscrapers, when there is too much terror inside the building. Who knows what any one of us would do in such circumstances?

    Yes, I have contemplated suicide myself. I am not mentally ill. I am noe clinically depressed. It is simply that I have felt my,lufe to be u bearable. I am not weak. I am very strong. But if we had assisted suicide in our country (the U.K.);then what would I do? The answer is – I don’t know. But suicide is also catching. My best friend committed suicide. Well, two, actually. I feel drawn towards them. Especially when I got cancer that was very advanced. I could have sworn I heard them calling me!

    And now that I am blind, wheelchair bound, in constant pain,vand with only a husband who is also wheekchair bound to cate for me and no possibility of assustance – yes, suicide often calks me. So there is so much that I could say here.

    Interesting
    Ist Cristan. Mthankyou. Sorry about any typing mistakes!

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  7. Oh my I couldn’t like this enough. So truthful and an eye opener for those who have never dealt with the beast that is depression and suicidal ideation. I’ve dealt with major, severe and functional depression for years mostly all of my life due to childhood trauma and just not knowing how to properly cope with life. A few years ago I had also attempted suicide and I had those same thoughts feeling trapped by my mind, my hopelessness but also afraid to die, afraid to leave my babies and husband behind and afraid to not stay and see how I can overcome the beast of depression. This written piece beautifully resonated with me and my experiences with depression, suicidal ideation and attempted suicide and how when I finally decided to get professional help and help from my close circle of family and friends from those who cared to go deep enough with me to help me heal and bring the foundation of my hearts and abuse to myself to the surface consistently and in a safe place it made a world of a difference. Thank you for sharing this. For shining a light on mental health and bringing awareness.

    Liked by 2 people

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  10. I have Bipolar Disorder (undiagnosed), Asperger’s Syndrome, and severe OCD. Not a day goes by when I’m not wracked by uncontrollable disturbing thoughts. I’ve been in two mental hospitals since I was a teenager and people (like my dad) have always wondered why I have to be miserable when there’s ‘so much good in this world’ and ‘no one’s abused me.’ I’ve spent years beating myself up because I have ‘no reason to be depressed,’ even though the problem is clearly biological, not environmental. I haven’t read anything by David Foster Wallace (honestly, the sheer size of his books are intimidating to me) but I really like that quote, the burning building seems like an apt metaphor. :)

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  13. Reblogged this on My Mindless Drivel and commented:
    In light of two recent high-profile suicides, just a reminder that help is available. Cristian Mihal wrote this blog about it. Also, NBC News did an article on finding mental health services that you can afford.

    Please seek help if you’re struggling. For those who aren’t, be a little kinder, and a little more aware of others’ struggles. We’re all in this together.

    Liked by 1 person

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  22. Good work – some of you that read this may be interested in reading Daniel Klein for a perspective on the thought process and the positive side – an interesting philosopher if ever there was one…

    Liked by 1 person

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  24. Depression is a horrible disease. I fight it daily. I have had this since I was 10 years old. I’m getting better, but it’s taken so much research and work on my own to reach this place that I am now in. Thanks for you post … it truly helps. Awareness, talking about it all is key. Katie

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  25. Depression turns to a person to commit suicides,and in these cases those people having this situation we need morw attention to help and ovecome their emptiness inside

    Like

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  26. this is so honest and poignant and so…true. I’ve come close to ending my life before and I’m still in a pretty dark place, and this just really resonated with me. thank you for sharing and you have my wholehearted support ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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  28. Tell me about it. I’ve suffered from severe depression myself. Someone I know was found wandering about threatening suicide, and the police closed a main road whilst they tried to talk to her … and a mutual acquaintance of ours complained that she was an attention-seeker. People are not always very understanding.

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  30. Very well written, no one born with the depression it’s just a feeling phase and to maintain that depression phase in the depressed is most of the times because of others who keep reminding them that they have something missing in their life or they can get everything…depression is something, every thing etc these words are fuel to depression, so if we want a happy nation, happy world we should help each other by looking in them with a feeling of fulfilment…

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  31. A hugely important topic and one we can’t dismiss. No, you did not use too many cliches in your post. Mental health needs to be openly discussed and not dismissed. Having helped my son through dark days has taught me so much.

    Liked by 1 person

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  32. I’ve heard it said, that you shouldn’t be proud that you are strong enough to beat depression when others struggle, rather be thankful that your depression was weaker than what others face. Meaning, you never know what the other person is going through and why they act the way they do, so don’t assume they are weak if they ultimately choose suicide.

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  38. Literally a life saving thought that changed my life and saved me is an advice I got from a friend, “what’s the worst that could happen?”. Whenever I get anxious or depressed I ask myself this question. I may not have a job, what’s the worse that could happen? I may have to move to a smaller apartment, I may have to eat cereal for all three meals but what’s the worse that could happen? I still have my education, my skills, and my talents. I am still me. I can get another job! I know people have different issues and everyone’s struggle and degree of endurance is not the same. But the next time you feel it’s all going downhill, think of what’s the worst that could happen. I promise you’ll be able to find a solution to at least some of your problems and realize that it’s not the worst thing really. I hope all you people stay strong and feel the strength within you to make it through the day 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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