The thing that makes you exceptional, if you are at all, is inevitably that which must also make you lonely. – Lorraine Hansberry
Most people loathe solitude. Silence. The empty room. Nothing but their minds for company…
But, to paraphrase John Steinbeck, all great and precious things are built in solitude. They grow out of it. The struggle of having to tame your thoughts, to concentrate on the task at hand, to decide every minute of every day what’s important, what must be done, despite what you feel you should be doing.
That’s the thing; the “big secret.” You don’t have to act on all your emotions. You don’t have to eat sweets whenever you feel like it, or skip the gym because it’s too hot outside or you’re feeling tired or you’re just not feeling like it (that’s also an emotion.) We all know what is the right thing to do, what we should do, yet…it seems as if it’s the most difficult thing in the world at times.
Because the rule of thumb is this: always take the hard route. The struggle. The fight. The grind. That is the way that yields most rewards. Things don’t just fall into your laps. You have to put in the effort to get them. And if you only put in the effort when you feel like it…
Success is all about fighting boredom and routine. Success is rarely about intellect or talent, but about perseverance and discipline; about going all the goddamn way with the things that truly matter.
Don’t just start things, finish them.
Don’t sit on your ass wishing for better days…
Take what you can, do what you must…with what you have.
I started working out in my apartment because I couldn’t afford a gym membership. With one lousy dumbbell. Not ever two. Just one. And yet…I kept going, kept pushing myself…I wanted to learn…
Getting in shape seemed impossible, and yet…
That’s the thing. Question everything. Question yourself questioning yourself. Whenever you feel like something is impossible, just ask yourself why. Your mind will tell you. And then ask yourself if you’re mind is actually right, or just talking nonsense. Whenever someone tells you to be realistic, don’t take it to heart. If they’re afraid to take risks, that doesn’t mean you should be to.
And this takes me to my initial idea. Solitude. Being alone. I do not say lonely…those who are lonely are desperate for an escape. No. Alone. Do not be afraid to walk this life alone if you have to. Fight for what you want. Do what you must. Sacrifice. Fight for the things you want as if your life depends on them, because it does.
If only…the saddest words in all creation. Regret. For the things we should have done, for the things we could have done. Don’t grow complacent with ideas or people. Don’t be lazy. Because when it’ll be too late to get what you want, you’ll spend the rest of your life dying every single day.
It hurts to not be loved, but it’s even worse not to love. It hurts to be given up on, but it’s far worse a tragedy to give up on someone who would never give up on you. It hurts to fail, but it’s far worse to stay stuck in your comfort zone.
We are designed to aspire for greatness. To achieve. To conquer ourselves, to conquer our emotions.
Do you feel lonely? Bored? Stressed? Depressed?
Then do something about it.
If you’re not living your dream life, fight like hell for it.
Fill your days with things that matter. Do those things. Do what makes you happy, not what makes other people happy. Don’t be realistic. Dream big. Work hard. Carpe that motherfucking diem.
You only have one life. Make the most of it.
your posts are so amazing……….i think you should write a self-help book!
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Thank you so much! I thought about it. Not so sure I should.
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well, in my humble opinion……….you really should.
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My wife will often say inaction is action, but it’s typically not contributing to the goals you dream of accomplishing. Dreaming is this romanticized concept that often doesn’t include the gritty reality of hard work, failure, and sacrifice.
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The dream is free. The hustle is sold separately.
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The American dream has gone from working hard for something to winning the lottery.
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I love love love this!!
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Stone walls do not a prison make,
Nor iron bars a cage:
Minds innocent and quiet take
That for an hermitage.
If I have freedom in my love,
And in my soul am free,
Angels alone, that soar above,
Enjoy such liberty.
-To Althea, from Prison (Final Stanza), Richard Lovelace (1642)
As always, Chris, an enjoyable and invigorating read. Carpe that motherfucking diem, indeed…suitable signage for the inside of an otherwise locked front door.
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Wow, that was beautiful. Thank you for sharing, and thank you for reading.
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I have been slacking off from blogging for a long time now, and I just happened to go through the posts at random and I chanced to read this. In the past few days, I am going through most of what you have written about in this post. I am not sure how much of these things I can incorporate right away in my life but, reading this sure does make me want to. Thank you so much for this post.
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great post
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Thank you, Kerrie!
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“The price of being a sheep is boredom.
The price of being a wolf is loneliness.
Choose one or the other with great care.”
–Courtesy of the fine Hugh MacLeod:
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Indeed, Kim. Indeed.
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