Does Your Why Make You Cry?

My home country of Romania is last in the European Union when it comes to reading books. The book market here is the stuff of nightmares for any writer.

What do these two sentences mean?

I shouldn’t be able to do what I do. I shouldn’t have attempted it. And I don’t think that you ever gave it a thought while reading my posts.

My parents never read a single thing I wrote because my words are foreign to them. They never read my stories or novels. Odds are, they never will. They never understood my dream of becoming a writer. Nor did they encourage it. But they also didn’t try to talk me out of it. Too often.

To be a writer in Romania is some sort of eccentric pastime. Something like that. I wanted to make it into a career. I wanted to be great, to reach levels of mastery that require of you that you hold the world on your shoulders from time to time.

I lost track of how many people told me that I couldn’t, I shouldn’t. Many more told me to just be realistic.

Realist has always sounded to me as cutting down your own wings, forever giving up on your dream of flying because you are afraid you’d fall down a couple times.

A decade or so ago, I’d write something, and I’d be proud of it, and I’d want to share it with the world, and there would be absolutely no one willing to read my words. Other times, they’d hate it. I cried myself to sleep more times than I can count.

Insults make you angry, indifference breaks one’s heart.

That’s why your why is important.

Why do you do what you do?

Why do you blog, if you do? Why do you write? Why do you create art? Why do you have that business?

You need to know your why, and it has to be strong enough to fuel your passion, to fuel your capacity to sacrifice, to be patient, to fight all those losing battles and to somehow emerge victorious.

Be honest.

Does your why make you cry?

When I was thirteen years old or so, I read Dune by Frank Herbert. And I was certain that was the most beautiful thing ever written into existence. I would have given anything for the chance to write such a story. And then I read The Great Gatsby, and I fell in love with the written word even more.

And each book made me fall in love with the way stories made me feel. And I wanted to make others feel the same way.

I’ve always believed that words are powerful. Incredibly so. Words have the power to make us forget who we are, where we are. We forget the world around us.

We read about people who are like us and wish to be different, or we read about people who are who we’d like to be and we summon enough courage to try to become like them.

We read about love, success, failure, heartbreak, life and death, and we understand the world around us better.

They say that when one person tells a story to another, both the listener and the speaker, their hearts start beating in sync.

It’s as if the universe isn’t made of atoms, but of stories. It’s made of all the stories ever written into existence, of all the stories we wrote about ourselves, of all the stories we wrote knowing that they’d never come true while secretly wishing they would, somehow, someday, come to life.

But we know for a fact that we’re made of stories. The story of who we are, of what we love, of who we loved and lost and have never stopped hoping they’d return to us.

That is my why. That’s why I write, why I blog. This is why I am writing these words that you are now reading.

In other words, I write because I exist. And it’s nice to live, to feel, to love, to eat, to breathe… but it’s equally beautiful to let others know that you exist.

Some days I fear that if I ever stop writing, I’d no longer exist.

That’s my why. And, yes, it does make me cry. It does make me feel like there’s something magic in the act of writing about imaginary people in such a way that others fall in love with them.

I like to write about the impossible and let my readers wish it into existence with their tears.

I write because the beauty that resides in my soul needs to find a proper home. I write because the beauty around me needs to be read about by those who might have missed it. I write because it’s my goal to bring a bit of comfort to the disturbed, and maybe disturb a bit those who are too comfortable.

Your why has to be so strong that you’d do what you do even if you’d never earn a single dollar from it or a word of praise. Your why has to be so strong that you’d do it even if the world would constantly belittle your ambitions.

Your why has to be so strong that you’d be willing to live for your dream, to breathe this dream like air, to give up comfort, sleep, and food for it, to die for it.

This is the way of the world.

Do or die.

Succeed or fail.

Your why determines whether you want it or kind of want it.

I suggest that you should want it, that you should find a why that makes you cry, a why that is so strong that you do everything as if your life depends on your dream coming true.

Why?

Because your life does depend on your dream coming true or not.

42 Comments

  1. I can perfectly relate to this. The mind is like a caged bird and what writing does is to set the mind free. Many issues of the heart if undocumented are no different from the unfertilised eggs…..

    Liked by 5 people

  2. Yes. My last book made me cry. But readers never were able to reach those parts. I was inflamed. My other stories weren’t like this. I realized that they are used to having books written for them. Now my story is as close as my pillow.

    Liked by 4 people

  3. That’s right, Christian, by the way, in the past century couldn’t happen what is possible today: to write a post and rejoice for been read anywhere in the planet!

    Like we are neighbors. The creative souls crave to be citizens of the world.

    Liked by 5 people

  4. I write to find myself
    I write because my thoughts is like a fire in my bones that needs to be let out.
    And ink and paper, writing is my way out
    I write to shed my soul
    I write because writing is my visa to travel round the world of hearts and emotions.
    I write because writing is like air to me and food to my soul

    Thanks so much for this article, Christian.
    It was timely…

    Liked by 5 people

  5. This is beautiful, so powerful and touching. It resonates deeply with me and I’m glad to know a little bit of your journey ad how you fought to get to where you are right now against such tall odds. It’s truly inspiring and relatable for me. I’ve always known that to sustain writing, Passion and conviction is necessary. If it’s to become more than a hobby, if one is to become relevant as a writer, the drive and will must be there…

    Liked by 4 people

  6. “I write because the beauty that resides in my soul needs to find a proper home.” Talk about powerful, that alone almost made me cry. This post resonates with me very well. Writing for me is as natural as breathing, it always lights up a fire within me and I don’t know what I’d do without it. Love your creative spirit ^.^

    Like

  7. And i quote (from your post), “I write because the beauty that resides in my soul needs to find a proper home.” That is sooo profound.

    So so true…the why doesn’t always spring from a smile – sometimes our writing is an overflow of words and thoughts unspoken…until pen meets paper or fingers connect with keys.

    Liked by 3 people

  8. I am a Romanian writer. I write for my enjoyment. I think that to be a good writer you need to write good things people like. To be a great author you need to write because you love it, not because you just want people to see your good stuff. I believe that everybody can write. And whatever writing someone does—the stories they make—the stories they write because they loved writing—will most certainly get attention. I know I was bogged down cause people would not look at my writing or if they did, they would not like it. Then there was a moment in my life where I sat down and told myself: why am I writing these stories? Was it only for the reader? I have concluded that writing for myself first is what got me to keep going.

    Liked by 4 people

  9. I am an American who lived and worked in Romania for many years when Nicolae Ceaușescu was in power. My experience has made me appreciate the power of your writing and passion for creativity and expression. Your faith in your dreams is one of the reasons I follow your blog. Dreams are the roadmaps that God gave us to follow, and it’s inspiring to see someone follow their dreams in the face of potential persecution and such challenges.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Even no one understand me as I had taken this blogging and writing career seriously and I truly beleive that one day I’ll write my first book. You know people likes you always motivate me and that’s the reason I follow you. Whatever problems you faced I beleive that you had conquered it. Never give up is my mantra because I’m doing what I love doing. There are millions of people who are not taking risk to fulfill their dreams. We’re those people who are bravely fighting all the odds to achieve our dreams.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. “Without art I would be a nihilist” I cant remember exactly who said that, maybe Donald Glover, maybe me. Writing helps me make sense of my deepest thoughts and anxieties. If I gave up writing for the sake of being realistic, I would probably lose my sense of reality.

    Liked by 1 person

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