If only a dollar would have magically been transferred to my bank account every time I was my own worst critic…
The thing is, life could be so much better for many of us, if only we’d get rid of certain limiting beliefs, negative thinking habits, and an obsession for listening to the advice of a risk-averse and scared brain.
Negative thinking patterns have a way of monopolizing our words and actions. The key to success, in my humble opinion, is learning to spot these defective habits and replace them with empowering affirmations.
If a thought does not serve you, it has to be replaced.
Let’s take a look at the 7 most destructive mindsets that affect the way we perceive ourselves and the world around us.
At the time, Bezos was worth around 9 billion dollars, yet he worked from a less than impressive office, drove around in a Honda, and had a terrible sense of fashion.
Today’s richest man was working from headquarters located on the same street as a pawn shop, a heroin-needle exchange, and a “porno parlor.” His office, the badly stained carpet, the desk, made out of a door propped up on two-by-fours, all give the impression of the kind of hopelessness that people often encounter whenever they embark on the strange and perilous odyssey of building a business from scratch.
Success is not easy. Overnight success is so statistically improbable that we might as well think it doesn’t even exist.
The struggle is real. Just imagine in what kind of conditions Bezos was working when he first started his company, if this was what his office looked like when running what had grown into a 30 billion-dollar company.
The same way Elon Musk had to borrow money to pay the rent for his apartment in the early days of SpaceX, all successful people had to deny themselves pleasure and comfort in order to bring their dreams to life.
There’s no way around it, I’m afraid.
And there are certain aspects of success that rarely get talked about. We romanticize success to the point that it feels like a walk in the park. You do what you love, always a smile on your face…
Here are seven brutal truths about success that no one ever talks about.
“The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.” — Carl Rogers
Every night is a dark night of the soul; fear and loathing overwhelm you whenever you stare in a mirror or think about your actions. You fail at everything you do. You struggle with low self-esteem, high-functioning depression, and social anxiety.
How do you change that?
Because you’re not going to change by spending all the time wishing you didn’t feel like that; you’re not going to change by writing down a bunch of positive affirmations and reading them aloud in front of the mirror every morning.
The paradox of changing oneself is that the more you want to change a negative trait you have, the more you become it.
When it comes to getting what we want, desire is an important element. Set a goal, go all in, and achieve it. The beach body, the business, or the book you want to write, all require that you genuinely want to do them.
But when it comes to changing the inner reality of who we are, it doesn’t work that way.
“Dream the impossible dream and the world will not grind you under, it will lift you up. This is the trick. This is what all these teachers and philosophers who really counted, who really touched the alchemical gold, this is what they understood.” — Terrence McKenna
You are probably familiar with the saying, “Jack of all trades, master of none.”
We use it to justify the idea that one must focus on one thing, reach mastery, as this is the only way towards success and fulfillment.
As most simple truths in life, we use it because we don’t want to use precious mental energy in trying to understand the nuanced truths of success and mastery.
The nuanced point is that even the notorious specialists, such as Salvador Dali or Pablo Picasso, were masters of a multitude of skills and crafts, not the least of which is their charisma and their ability to market themselves.
It’s probably no big secret that I am a firm believer in personal development. That’s one way to explain it, I guess. It means that I listen to motivational speeches while I work, read everything from popular self-help books to psychology and NLP, and tried all sorts of stuff to get to be more focused, more energetic, and motivated to achieve my goals.
That being said, this list of twelve rules is something that I just have to share with you.
When you see someone who’s fantastic at what they do, you just can’t ignore them.
They operate at what is commonly called “highest level.” Their every thought, action, and word is in reach of mastery.
But, as contrary to what most people believe, especially those who dedicate their lives to just watching mastery on a TV screen all day long, the desire for greatness resides in all of us. We all have this innate desire to work hard in order to become great at what we do.
Unfortunately, most people give up on this feeling in order to watch someone else be that good. That’s why we watch sports, or movies, or those auditions on Whatever Country’s Got Talent.
We want to be reminded that some people can hold the world on their shoulders, but we don’t want to hold the damn thing ourselves.
As I often say, everybody wants to eat, but few are willing to hunt.
Well…. today I am going to share with you four rules of success that the successful among us rarely share, four rules that are going to help you on your quest for mastery and greatness.
We tell ourselves three big lies: about our past, about our present, and about our future.
We distort our past because we are constantly rewriting our memories, our thoughts are constantly altering our present, and our expectations are a distortion of the future.
Why are they lies? Well, our memories are imperfect, our thoughts are poisoned by bias, and our expectations are most often plain wrong. Nothing happened exactly as we remember it, nothing is happening exactly as we think it is happening, and nothing turns out as we expect.