How to Use Your Inner Critic to Your Advantage

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Everyone, no matter their level of success in life, struggles with their inner critic.

It’s just how it is.

Most of my twenties were controlled by the debilitating beliefs that are often the side-effect of a too harsh inner critic. I was often paralyzed by fear. Wrecked by insecurity. I struggled with high-functioning depression, anxiety, and low self-esteem.

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Don’t Try. Be

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“Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”

Steve Jobs

Charles Bukowski almost didn’t become the writer he had always dreamt of being. He worked in a post-office until his fifties, even though he tried and often failed to earn enough from his writing so he could quit his job.

Abraham Lincoln failed time and time again. He lost his bid for State Legislature when he was 23 years old. Six years later, he lost his bid to become Speaker in the Illinois House of Representatives.

In 1848, at the age of 39, Lincoln failed to become Commissioner of the General Land Office in D.C. Ten years later, he failed to become a U.S. Senator.

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The One Question You Should Always Ask Yourself Before Pursuing a Goal

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Goals are essential to our happiness. Working towards a worthy goal ensures that we live a life that is meaningful and fulfilling.

If so, why do we fail at most of our goals? Why do we struggle with motivation?

If our vision of the future is so compelling, if we know why we want it, if we know how to get it, then why do we struggle to do it?

I believe it all comes down to the fact that we never ask ourselves this simple question, a question that perhaps you don’t even want to think about, let alone answer.

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You’re Not Supposed to Love What You Do

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You are supposed to be so good they can’t ignore you

If I had a dollar for every time someone told me how lucky I was to be doing what I love…

Look, do what you love, love what you do, follow your passion, all of it is terrible advice. It just is.

We often struggle to figure out if we truly love doing something or we just love the idea of it or the rewards we imagine.

And that’s why it gets tricky.

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Are You Addicted to Self-Help?

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The obvious issue with self-help is this: its ultimate goal is to reach a point where you no longer need it.

Think about it: The whole goal of personal growth is to build yourself to be the person you’ve always wanted. The whole point of pursuing happiness is to reach a point where happiness no longer has to be pursued.

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This Is What Karma Is All About

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“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”

C.G. Jung

Here’s a fun experiment for you to try: write down every single thing you do during an average day. In half-hour increments. But be honest with yourself. Can’t write down: “from 9 AM to 5 PM — work.”

Be brutally honest.

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On Being Kind to Those Who Least Deserve It

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Destiny is not what happens to you, but how you react to what happens to you.

There’s this story about Winston Churchill who, after the Japanese bombed Hong Kong and Singapore, forcing Great Britain to declare war, he signed off with the following words, “I have the honour to be, with high consideration, Sir, Your obedient servant.”

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How to Let Go of Limiting Beliefs

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For most of my twenties, there were so many things I didn’t want to be true about myself, yet I somehow thought them to be facts.

I believed I was quite unlovable, which was my excuse for not trying to be worthy of love in any way. I believed I’d always struggle financially, so I made no serious effort to earn more, to save more, or to build multiple streams of income.

I believed that life was harsh, that people didn’t like me for being skinny, kind of ugly, and not nearly as charming as everyone else, so I lived in a state of perpetual fear — I somehow expected the world to decide that I wasn’t worthy of living on this planet anymore and send me off to spend the rest of my life on the dark side of the moon or something.

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It’s Not About How Much Money You Save, It’s About How Much Mental Energy You Spend

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I don’t usually write about money, but there’s a trend that I couldn’t help but disagree with.

If you want to save money, you’ve got to spend less.

It makes sense. It’s clever, it’s helpful, and it’s the kind of counterproductive advice that has the potential to make a lot of people miserable.

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10,000 Hours of Procrastination

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In his 2008 release, Outliers, journalist Malcolm Gladwell introduced the notion that one has to spend 10,000 hours working at their craft before they can become a true master.

Now, even though the idea is catchy, and it’s a valid one indeed, there’s a lot to be said about the kind of work one has to put. It’s not just work-work, but it’s working towards mastery, a competitive and aggressive way of working towards bettering yourself day in and day out.

10,000 hours of that, and you’ll become so good they can’t ignore you.

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