Interview with the anonymous blogger behind 10000posts

First of all, tell us a little bit about your blog.

a. July 26 2015. I was sitting in my usual cafe drinking my daily dose of caffeine. After 8 years of living abroad, I was back in my country (note: I don’t call my country home). I was scared. I felt like failure – I dropped out of Medical school with only 2 years left. I had only 2 years left to be called Doctor X. But I dropped out. I was tired of studying. I was tired of myself; I simply loathed myself.
A few months before that day, my oldest brother passed away. I didn’t grief. I had to be strong for my family. I kept my feeling to myself.
So, I was in that cafe, loathing and hating myself. I was a failure. I didn’t achieve anything in my life. I always give up before the finish line. I never finish what I start. I have no hobbies. I have no goals. I don’t have real friends (because I don’t know the definition of a friend). I was living in my head. Continue reading

Exceptional

art_tryingThe thing that makes you exceptional, if you are at all, is inevitably that which must also make you lonely. – Lorraine Hansberry

Most people loathe solitude. Silence. The empty room. Nothing but their minds for company…

But, to paraphrase John Steinbeck, all great and precious things are built in solitude. They grow out of it. The struggle of having to tame your thoughts, to concentrate on the task at hand, to decide every minute of every day what’s important, what must be done, despite what you feel you should be doing. Continue reading

Writing a blog post

First, I’d like to say that there is no how-to guide or recipe for writing a brilliant post. That being said, I’d also like to point out the fact that some posts seem to perform better than others. Lists and guides usually receive more comments and likes than “normal” blogs.

So this is not a how to guide. We’re just going to talk about the major components of a blog post. Continue reading

Fight on

When you feel there’s no hope, fight on. When you feel you’ve got nothing left, fight on. When you feel that life’s not fair, that all you want to do is crawl under your blanket and cry, fight on. Clench your teeth, fight the pain, fight the tears, the anger, the bitter remorse, because the only true thing about life is that it goes on. It keeps moving forward, impervious to your actions or pleas for help. Never give up, never retreat, always fight back. That’s action and reaction. Fight back. Don’t run away, don’t let yourself be paralyzed by fear. Fight. Continue reading

Help needed

From time to time I contemplate the idea of abandoning my dream of becoming a full time writer. I get all kinds of ideas in my head. I’m just pretending to be a writer, and I’m not really good enough, and that I should simply give up.

A couple years ago, before I started this blog, one of my uncles asked me about my writing. Back then I was uploading stories on Wattpad, and I was having a lot of fun. So I told him that I had talked with a girl from Etiopia, who said that she really enjoyed my stories. So much that she cried.

And, well, he asked me about money. Was I earning enough?

In fact, I wasn’t making money at all. And I told him that, and I told him that when a stranger genuinely appreciates your art, that’s worth more than all the money in the world.

I was happy back then. Continue reading

Fight on

When you feel there’s no hope, fight on. When you feel you’ve got nothing left, fight on. When you feel that life’s not fair, that all you want to do is crawl under your blanket and cry, fight on. Clench your teeth, fight the pain, fight the tears, the anger, the bitter remorse, because the only true thing about life is that it goes on. It keeps moving forward, impervious to your actions or pleas for help. Never give up, never retreat, always fight back. That’s action and reaction. Fight back. Don’t run away, don’t let yourself be paralyzed by fear. Fight. Continue reading

When the going gets tough

If you’ve been following this blog for a few months, you probably know that I’ve been struggling. Trying to obtain much needed funding for my projects and novels. But also trying to make ends meet. You know, there’s nothing romantic in wondering whether or not you’re going to eat the next day.

Yet I tried my best. I wrote and wrote, and I blogged.

Sometimes I wonder whether or not I should give up. If I’m actually not good enough. But I’ve always liked inspiring people, no matter how I felt about myself or my life. The truth is, I really am a deeply unhappy person. I’m just trying to make everyone else feel better than I do. I’ve always done that.

I just want to do what I love… don’t know.

This website depends on you. My future depends on you. This blog… my career. Two and a half years of work…

I can’t even describe how frustrating all this has become. How impossible it all seems. It’s all going from bad to worse.

There’s really nothing else to say.

If you want to help me out, if you really do want that, you can contribute any amount you see fit via PayPal to to contact [at] cristianmihai [dot] net. Any amount matters. Any amount helps me immensely.

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Also, anyone who donates $50 or more will be featured as sponsor for one month and will get a blog post reblogged.

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