Does Your Why Make You Cry?

Romania is last in the European Union when it comes to reading books. The book market here is something out of a horror story for writers.

What do these two sentences mean?

I shouldn’t be able to do what I do. And I don’t think that you ever gave it a thought while reading my posts.

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[REVIEW] Metamorphosis by Raquel Swann

From Amazon.com:

Every morning when you wake up does the mirror tell you lies? 

Today, Raquel doesn’t feel quite herself as she opens her eyes in a mountain cottage beside a peculiar old woman with seemingly humble intentions. A choice, in a small shot glass, sits in front of her ready to change her destiny forever. Everything depends on her next move. Everything. A sinister evil which grows in the shadows must be stopped before it’s too late. How can you stop what you can’t see? Can one person really make a difference? 

Metamorphosis is a serious deep dive into the heart of a transgender woman within a fantasy backdrop. This book examines social issues facing the entire LGBTQIA community with a focus on what it truly means to be yourself. There is a hero inside all of us, please join Raquel as she attempts to find strength in the face of unfathomable odds. Whether you are MTF FTM Nonbinary Transgender – there is something to soothe your dysphoria within the pages of this book. 

Review:

Metamorphosis. Defined as a change of the form or nature of a person. Defined as a painful transformation, one that alters you in ways that you cannot go back.

Who do you wish to be? What would you do to become that person?

Metamorphosis by Raquel Swann asks these very questions, and provides us the tools to answer them ourselves in a story that is enthralling and easy to read. An intriguing concept, written as a sort of fairytale, this first person narrative tackles the issue of identity in an original and interesting manner.

To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to tell you who you should be means to fight a never ending battle. It means to face demons that you’d much rather ignore, it means to accept the uncertainty, fear, and pain of being yourself among others who’d like you to be who they need you to be.

And this theme, this burning desire to be ourselves, it’s something we all struggle with, whether we like to admit it or not.

Metamorphosis is well worth your time for this reason alone. The struggle to be self-defined, fueled from within, while also coming to terms with the fact that we don’t discover ourselves, but rather create that self through heartache and pain.

Who do you want to be? Why? And when was the last time you felt like yourself?

Why Failing is (Actually) a Good Thing

failing

They say you can’t beat a man who doesn’t give up.

The first piece of writing I ever wrote was rubbish. And I kept on adding more rubbish. Then I wrote something else. And then someone said I was a retard. And I wanted to prove them wrong.

I’ve failed time and time again. In all aspects of life.

The first novel I self-published sold 4 copies in 4 months. It got a single 2 star review on Goodreads, and then I unpublished the damn thing.

And yet I didn’t give up.

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The Writer: Chapter 6

Do you know what the saddest thing about you is?

No one is going to remember you. Fifty years from now, when you’re long gone, when all the pictures of you and your family have decayed like old bones in a cemetery, you’ll be less than nothing.

It will be as if you never even existed.

So what’s the purpose of it all? Why should you pretend to be the good guy, why are you trying to bring judgment upon the world, when the world itself doesn’t want you, doesn’t need you, and most certainly is going to forget you the moment you die? Why would anyone want to be nothing? Continue reading

[Short Story] Lucky You

The odds of being born on any given day are about 0,27%. Of course, certain days are different than others, due to religious, cultural, or practical reasons. That’s why the odds of being born on Christmas Day are 0.0022%.

I was born on Christmas Day.

***

You ever hear the expression: “Karma’s a bitch?”

I know, I know. Such a terrible cliche. But it’s kind of true. I never met her, but I can tell you that “bitch” is the best possible definition of karma.

Fate. Destiny.

Fate fortunes the bold, the Romans would say.

It does. But she also screws them over, in ways no one could ever possibly imagine.

Like the ancient gods of Greece.

Like the way Zeus screwed mortal men and especially women for centuries.

You know, in that witty and cruel manner that makes you wonder if gods were ever on our side. Continue reading

The Writer: Chapter 3

I appreciate you coming here, I really do, but you’ve got to stop looking at me like that. You remind me of my shrink. She kept staring at me in such a way, as if I were going to strangle myself with my necktie.

Have you ever heard of Sisyphus? No, it’s not a venereal disease. He was an ancient king. Nasty bastard. He enjoyed killing people. He was deceitful and his greed for power and money was insatiable. Eventually, the gods punished him by making him roll a boulder up a hill, but before he could reach the top, the boulder would always roll back down, so he would never complete his task.

Like Prometheus, who was punished by having his liver eaten by an eagle every day only for it to grow back and be eaten again the next day.

If you thought you were smarter than Zeus, he would punish you in a way you’d never forget. Continue reading

The Writer: Prologue

There’s this neat trick they do in television, especially in hour long TV dramas. It’s called a teaser and its sole purpose is to make you want more. It usually ends with a cliffhanger just so you don’t change the channel when that lengthy commercial break starts.

Sometimes the teaser is a glimpse of a scene close to the end of that episode. This is how I’m going to begin my story – with a short scene close to the end.

I guess the first thing you should know is where this scene is taking place.

Imagine a centuries old oak forest, one that would creep most people out. Huge trees, rotten carcasses, contorted ghosts. Boughs, now useless limbs, lying on the ground.

The second thing you should know is “when.”

Henry James thought “summer afternoon” to be the two most beautiful words in the English language. So let’s say that’s our “when.”

Summer afternoon. I bet you’re thinking about sunlight slipping through thousands of leaves, twigs greedily stretching skyward. But maybe it’s cloudy, maybe fog curls around leaves and branches, a trembling embrace. The forest has its own sounds that appear to be most sinister.

Your lungs gasping for air, you’re drowning in that sea of ash-colored fog. You can’t tell what is what, you fill every shadow with doubt. Continue reading